Monthly Archives: May 2010

college guidance, college planning, scholarships

In Honor of Memorial Day


military academyIn honor of Memorial Day, here are the guidelines and steps for applying to one of the five United States military academies (Army, Air Force, Navy, Coast Guard, and Merchant Marines). If you have a college-bound teen that’s interested in one of these academies it’s IMPERATIVE that they start early with their preparations.

MILITARY ACADEMIES

Attendance at one of our nation’s military academies is a very competitive process and should be undertaken well in advance of the senior year.There are five military academies that the Department of Defense maintains for the preparation of officers for the Air Force, Army, Coast Guard, Navy, and Merchant Marine. You must request an application from each academy. Your chances of being accepted to a service academy are enhanced if you apply to more than one and if you attend the summer session at the academy of your choice in the summer between your junior and senior years.

Application Process

The application process begins in the spring of your junior year. You should call or write to each academy at the end of April and request a Pre-Candidate Questionnaire. The brief pre-application is easily completed and returned the same day you get it in the mail. You must complete this form in order to receive a formal application. The official Candidate Application consists of several components, including the application, a physical aptitude test, a personality test, a personal statement, recommendations and various printed materials. You should fill out and return as many of the application materials as soon as possible. You may send in the various components of your application separately. Each academy will set up an admissions file on you as soon as they receive part or all of your application. You could be notified as early as November of your senior year of your admittance, although the normal date for notification is after mid-April.

You must be prompt in arranging your DODMERB (Department of Defense Medical Examination Review Board) Physical if you expect to be admitted on schedule. Many potential candidates have been denied admission because their physical was not completed on time. Successful completion of the DODMERB Physical is absolutely essential before admission can be granted. Schedule your physical as soon as you get your application. Keep in constant contact with the Admissions Board of the Academies to which you are applying to determine if there are delays in the receipt of application materials.

When you start your senior year, you should write letters to both your representative in the House of Representatives and to both California Senators requesting a nomination to each academy to which you are applying. Most nominations are given by the representative in your area. They will schedule you for an interview as soon as they receive your letter of request. Failure to schedule an interview can cost you your chance for admission.

Admissions Process

Successful appointment to an academy is based on the successful completion of your application, your physical, and a receipt of nomination. Candidates in the top 10% of their class, who have strong SAT scores, and who have demonstrated leadership in school or community activities are the strongest candidates for admission. Admission to the Academies is extremely competitive and only excellent students, who have demonstrated superior leadership skills, are granted admittance. A typical profile of a successful applicant would show a student with outstanding grades in the most difficult courses offered by the school; who has scored very well in the SAT; and who has been involved in school sports, student government, Boy Scouts, and community-based organizations. Students who do not gain admittance can be offered an appointment to an Academy Prep School for a year and then be admitted the following year. Most of the slots in Academy Prep Schools are reserved for recruited athletes or enlisted persons in the military.

Final Thoughts

Do not apply to a military academy unless you desire a career in the military! The lifestyle at each academy is very rigorous and only individuals who are strongly committed to a life in the military will be motivated to complete such a strenuous educational experience. The students interested in attending either one of the military academies or applying for the ROTC Scholarship program must begin early to insure they receive full consideration. Students serious about attending a military academy should contact the academy liaison officers or the academies directly for the Pre-Candidate Questionnaire no later than the spring of their junior year. The academies are located at:

Air Force Academy: Colorado Springs, CO 80840

Coast Guard Academy: New London, CT 06320

Merchant Marine Academy: Kings Point, NY 11024

Military Academy: West Point, NY 10996

Naval Academy: Annapolis, MD 21402

 

ROTC applications can be obtained from:

H2 AFROTC Recruiting Division, 551 E. Maxwell Blvd., Maxwell AB, AL 36112-6106, www.airforce.com

Navy-Marine Corps ROTC, Navy Recruiting Command Code 314, 801 N. Randolph St., Arlington, VA 22203-9933, 1-800-NAV-ROTC or www.nrotc.navy.mil/

College ARMY ROTC, Gold Quest Center, P. O. Box 3279, Warminster, PA 18974-9811, 1-800-USA-ROTC or www.armyrotc.com/

 

Costs:

None. Full US Government scholarships are awarded which cover tuition, room and board. Each student also receives a stipend ($400-600 per month) to meet cost of books, supplies, clothing and personal expenses.

college guidance, college planning, parenting

Top 10 Things to do BEFORE college

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Today’s post is by Lauren Joffe for The Real College Guide. While I agree with MOST of the suggestions, I’d like to add my “input” on the #9-Get Protection. Parents–talk with your college-bound teen about sex. They are going to be confronted with it (even if they choose to abstain). They need to understand the risks involved in “hooking up” and they need to understand that they ALWAYS have choices. Heading off to college is a daunting task for both parents and teens. Pass this list along to your teenager and use it as an opportunity for a heart-to-heart BEFORE they are on their own and independent.

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Hasta la vista, Mom and Dad. Hello, independence … but wait! Not so fast. Before you hit the road and leave your parentals behind, make sure you’re fully prepared for your new life of unwavering autonomy by spending your summer days wisely. Here, 10 things to do before you bolt. Ready, set …

1. Check up on your computer

New computers rarely come with programs like Microsoft Office, which you’ll definitely need, so be sure to purchase before you’re stuck handwriting your first assignment. And if you’re using an older comp, make sure it’s ready to take the heat: Since you will be on it all the time, install any updates or think about an upgrade. Also, find out if your school offers wireless Internet access (and if your computer is compatible) or whether you’ll need an Ethernet cable. Note: Some schools prohibit users without spyware or virus protection from connecting to the network. So, seriously, get the deets!

2. Make nice with your new dorm mate

As if you need us to tell you, check out her Facebook or MySpace page so you can get a feel for what you’re in for. Then buckle down and dial her digits for a quick chat to break the ice. Ask if there’s anything you should be aware of (like her fatal allergy to dusk or fear of the dark) and let her know of any immediate concerns you might have (like the fact that you can’t live without cable, and you’re relying on her to bring the big screen).

3. Do it up at a discount department store

Knock out the staples on your to-buy list before the selection is sold out: sheets, towels, toiletries and storage containers. But also pick up the following often-forgotten items you do not want to leave home without:

  • One-cup coffeemaker Brew your own instead of wasting a whole meal swipe for a cup o’ joe from the dining hall or blowing wads of money at Starbucks.
  • Mattress pad Make your dorm cot as comfy as the cushy oasis you’re used to at home while protecting yourself from whatever lived on your bed before you.
  • Rubber flip-flops Save yourself from the foot infections, clumps of hair and other mysterious masses that live in your communal shower.
  • Power strip Surge-protect your PC while hooking up your iPod station and hair dryer all at once.

4. Secure your class schedule

Enrollment deadlines are not meant to be ignored. In fact, the earlier you sit down to set your schedule, the better your course selection will be — so definitely don’t wait until the last minute. Also, pay attention to class restrictions, since some courses may require department approval ahead of time.

5. Plan your budget

Living costs at college range from campus to campus — the amount of money you’ll need largely depends on the location of your campus (cities can be more expensive) and the choices you make (like ordering in instead of suffering one more dining hall meal). Extra expenses will include social costs (movies, concerts, game tickets, cover for some parties), toiletries, food and drink beyond your meal plan, and transportation. Ask an upperclassman or student advisor how much cash she spends on average each week. Then pool your summer savings to determine whether you can cover your own expenses. If you need help, ask your parents or start looking for a part-time job on campus — before you get there.

6. Visit your school’s Web site

Your university may offer registration guides, campus news and summertime get-to-know-each-other sessions that you definitely do not want to miss out on — especially if you’re in the habit of throwing college junk mail in the trash (which is where important info may very well be). Plus, seeing your campus colors on the screen will psych you up — or at the very least, calm your nerves and get you into the spirit.

7. Get packing

Whether you’re shipping all your stuff UPS or loading up the car and driving cross-country, don’t leave packing to the last minute, when you’ll want to laze around and hang out with friends you won’t be seeing for a while. Designate an area of your house or bedroom to stow things you buy especially for college or things you don’t use daily but know you’ll need to take. Do not overpack! The amount of space you will have in your new room is likely much smaller than your current living quarters. Only bring what’s necessary, as your parents can always mail any left-behind belongings.

8. Put together a tool kit

Once you’re at school on your own, you’ll be shocked how often you’ll need a pair of scissors or a screwdriver — even if you’ve never used one. If you need to hang a poster or fix a loose screw, a simple, handy kit will be of great use when you least expect it. Bring a little box with a screwdriver (both Phillips and flathead), hammer, pliers, nails and screws. An inexpensive small cordless drill/screw gun is a good investment too. Pack scissors as well as adhesives, like sticky tack and tape, with your desk stuff.

9. Get protection

There’s no harm in being prepared for safe sex even if you have no particular plan or person in mind with whom to have it.

10. Hang with your high school pals

You know you’re going to miss your hometown friends, especially during the first few weeks you are apart. Yeah, you’ll make a whole slew of new friends. But make some memories first by hanging with the crew this summer.

admissions, college guidance, college planning, essays

The College Essay Demystified

Today’s guest blog post is from Brenda Bernstein, founder and senior editor of TheEssayExpert.com. Her team of trained writers, editors and coaches offer expert essay help and advice for college-bound teens. Parents–pass this post along to your teens as they struggle with that all-important college application essay.

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essay

IT’S NEVER TOO EARLY TO START THINKING ABOUT YOUR COLLEGE ESSAYS

 

If you are heading toward Senior year of high school, it’s time to start thinking about your college essays.  If you’re about to be a Junior and you’re reading this, it’s not too early.  The point is, start thinking of topics *now*!  You can even do it while you’re lying on the beach.

Why now?  Because the best college essays go through many lives.  You will write, re-write, and re-write again, over a period of weeks or even months.  Inspiration can hit at any time.

You want to have lots of time for your essays to percolate, to have those magic light bulb moments, or maybe even to wake up in the middle of the night from a dream and write a brilliantly creative essay (this really does happen!).

If you start thinking about your essays in November, you won’t have time for the process to work on you.  Instead of waking up with inspiration, you will wake up panicked or worried that you’re on the wrong track.  You don’t want that.

POSSIBLE ESSAY BRAINSTORMING QUESTIONS

Here are some things to think about – it’s not a complete list by any means.  Be creative!

  • What’s my favorite school subject and why?
  • What’s my favorite extracurricular activity and why?
  • What character in a book inspires me and why?
  • What’s a story of how I went from a simplistic understanding of how the world works to a more complex, nuanced understanding?
  • What’s an object that’s important to me and why?
  • What’s a place/location that’s important to me and why?
  • Who are the most important people in my life and what have I learned from them?

Notice that many of these questions ask “and why?”  It is important to think deeply about the meaning of things in your life.  Determine what about your experience is unique to you.  That’s what will make your story about your grandmother, trip to Israel or soccer practice different from the one sitting under it in the pile.

JUST DO IT.

Don’t sit around just thinking about these questions – start writing!  Designate a journal for your college essay ideas.  You will be surprised how quickly it fills up with great content.  Keep filling it up, and when you go back to what you wrote several months before, you might be happily surprised by some of your thoughts.

If you’re struggling finding the right topic, don’t despair.  There are professionals at The Essay Expert who will help you recognize what is special about your experiences and support you to present those experiences in words.  By working with an expert, you will end up with truly great college essays — and have the best chance of getting into the college of your dreams.

admissions, college guidance, college planning, social networks

Upcoming Twitter #Chats

Since my readers are all about gathering the BEST college information, you might like to know about some upcoming Twitter chats. College-related chats are popping up on Twitter and it’s a great place to chat with some experts and ask those questions that you’ve been dying to have answered.

Here is a list of upcoming chats:

#CollegeBound

Monday, May 24 at 4:00 p.m. EST #CollegeBound events will offer higher education administrators, college media, education experts, and others a unique hour to connect with and engage potential and incoming students. The first #CollegeBound chat, “Preparing for College,” will provide potential students of all ages with an inside look at the college research process, including how to navigate the plethora of available information, make a school decision that’s right for them, and get their school questions answered. The CollegeBound Network’s blog, “U. Got It?”, features more information on the event.

#CampusChat

#CampusChat is an online higher-ed conversation that takes place on Twitter hosted by Z. Kelly Queijo, founder of SmartCollegeVisit. Topics center around college visits, college admissions, and aspects related to life as a college student. This week’s upcoming chat Wednesday, May 26 at 9PM ET features @EricYaverbaum, author of  Life’s Little College Admissions Insights.

#CollegeChat

Bestselling author and higher-education journalist Lynn O’Shaughnessy will share tips from her new book “Shrinking the Cost of College: 152 Ways to Cut the Price of a Bachelor’s Degree” during the first edition of #CollegeChat on Twitter on June 1, 2010 at 6 pm Pacific. During the live Twitter chat, Lynn will discuss how to become a smart consumer in cutting the cost of college and will describe how the college financial aid process works and where to find the money.

I’m looking forward to seeing you at these chats and to participating in the lively discussions. Mark your calendars!

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For more information about how to use these tools or how to keep up with or follow a chat, read Z. Kelly Queijo, founder of SmartCollegeVisit‘s  blog post on Handshake 2.0: 3 Easy Ways to Keep in Step with a Twitter Chat

college costs, college planning, financial aid

A Review: Shrinking the Cost of College

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Today I will be reviewing Lynn O’Shaughnessy’s new book: Shrinking the Cost of College–152 ways to cut the cost of a bachelors degree.

Lynn O’Shaughnessy,  is an author, a college blogger and speaker. She writes about college strategies for TheCollegeSolutionBlog and CBSMoneyWatch. She gives presentations about college strategies for schools, companies and financial advisory firms.  Lynn also wrote The College Solution, which is an Amazon.com bestseller.

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Using facts and figures, Lynn explains clearly and simply where college money comes from and how to maximize your efforts to get the most money for a college education.

In the introduction of her book, Lynn states:

Billions of dollars of aid are available to students who attend college. About two out of three full-time college students receive grants, otherwise known as scholarships, to attend school. At private colleges, a whopping 82% receive scholarships…Most people look in the wrong place for help when they begin contemplating the looming college tab.

Her book systematically explains how the system works and how every parent can arm their arsenal of knowledge to help find and maximize the money that is out there. At the end of each chapter is a “To Do List” to point you in the right direction and help you gather all the information necessary to make the best financial decisions. Each chapter provides tips and “bottom line” information making it easy to apply and carry out each step in the process.

Lynn explains state grants, government grants, and private college scholarships. Her explanation of financial aid and how it works makes it easy to understand the most complicated of formulas. She explains where to find the data and how to analyze it to find the colleges that will provide the maximum financial aid to your college-bound teen. As a parent, this one tip alone will make the college application process less stressful and help to ease the college sticker price fears.

And finally, she explains the financial aid award letter and what to do when the letter arrives; walking you through how to analyze the award and how to handle an appeal for more money.

Here are just 10 tips from the book that will help you shrink the cost of college:

  1. Learn which 60 schools offer the best financial aid packages.
  2. Discover where you will find the biggest source of scholarship cash.
  3. Find out why 82% of students at private schools receive merit scholarships and how your child can.
  4. Learn why college sticker prices are meaningless and what that means for you.
  5. Understand how teens can win academic scholarships despite mediocre SAT/ACT scores.
  6. Get the list of 800+ colleges that don’t care about test scores.
  7. Discover how to attend out-of-state public universities for in-state prices.
  8. The most expensive colleges can be cheaper than your own state universities.
  9. You can make $200,000 and still qualify for significant need-based aid at pricey colleges.
  10. Students can win college money by using geography.

Every parent should grab a copy of this Ebook to add to their arsenal of college information. You can also chat with Lynn live on Twitter during an upcoming #CollegeChat June 1 at 6PM PST.

college guidance, college planning, parenting

Top 10 Do’s and Don’ts of parenting a college-bound teen

 

Last night, I watched a new popular sitcom called, “The Middle”. This show, while being extreme, personifies the trials and tribulations of parenting (especially teenagers). The teenage son is under-motivated and the teenage daughter is over-motivated. The parents are frustrated and at times complacent. These two teenage extremes pose a parenting dilemma: How do you find the balance?

I’ve written often about Helicopter Parents and even had a guest blogger, Chip Timmons, an Assistant Admissions Director,  give his Top 5 Helicopter Parent Stories . Even though perfect parenting does not exist, it is possible to take the BEST and the WORST examples of parenting a college-bound teen and learn from them.

On that note, I’ve come up with my TOP 10 Do’s and Don’ts of parenting a college-bound teen:

  1. Do encourage them. This is #1 because it is the most important tip of all. Teenagers who are headed to college need to know you believe in them and in their dreams. They need to feel your love and support. They need to know that you will always be there cheering for them, even if at times they don’t believe they can succeed.
  2. Don’t nag. Nagging never helps motivate a teenager. My rule was to tell my teenagers what was expected of them and allow them to own their own actions. There are so many tasks and deadlines related to the college admissions process. You can remind them without constantly nagging them. Helping them to stay organized will go a long way in helping you to avoid becoming a nag.
  3. Do step in when they ask for help. The college admissions process can be overwhelming. It’s unfair to expect them to handle everything alone. There are times when they will need your help and you will have to step in and parent.
  4. Don’t plow them down in an effort to help. Parents who take over are not helping their teens. They only hinder their success and enable them to become more dependent instead of independent. (That means: don’t do it for them, but it’s ok to offer your help.)
  5. Do listen. Pay attention to what your college-bound teen wants and needs. In order to do this, you must listen to them talk. It doesn’t have to be a regular sit-down either. Just listen during normal conversation to and from school, while they are getting ready for a date, or during family dinner time.
  6. Don’t speak for them. Believe it or not, they have an opinion. Many times, it’s an intelligent one and one that others want to hear. When your teen is asked a question of a counselor, tour guide, admissions officer, teacher or a college representative PLEASE let your teen answer for themselves.
  7. Do offer your advice. Advice is different from nagging. Advice helps your teen learn from your experience. Giving advice comes easily for parents, and it’s something our college-bound teens need to hear.
  8. Don’t expect them to make choices based on your likes and dislikes. When you give advice or opinions, many times your teen won’t choose or act as you expected. But that’s ok. Not all of their choices will be the best ones. And some of their choices, while not yours, will be what’s best for your teen.
  9. Do be a “present” parent. Parents tend to become less involved as their kids get older. If there was ever a time to be MORE involved, it’s during the teen years and the college admissions process.
  10. Don’t disappear from their lives just because they are in high school. Go to parent conferences. Attend high school events. Get involved in parent booster clubs. Participate in their lives. Travel with them to college visits and college fairs.

If you like this article, you might also like:

Being a Parent College Coach-The 3 C’s

Preparing your teen for college: It’s all about guiding, not doing

10 Concepts your teen should learn BEFORE college

Uncategorized

Graduation Parties (on a budget)


In the spirit of “graduation season”, our guest post this week by Nicole Frie for The Real College Guide, gives some great ideas on how to plan a graduation party on a budget (high school included!)

Think you need a ton of money to host a decent graduation party? Not necessarily. Here, we give you awesome — and inexpensive! — ideas for having the best graduation party on a budget … so start planning, party monster!

Free Graduation Party Invitations
Give a shout-out! Since you’re looking to save money, consider creating an Evite invitation or Facebook event page to spread the news of your graduation party. This is much cheaper (as in, it’s free!) and less time-consuming than paper invites. Plus, it shows a little bit o’ love to Mama Earth.

Best Graduation Party Venue
In his song “The Best of What’s Around,” Dave Matthews sings, “Turns out not where but who you’re with that really matters. …”

  • There’s no place like home. According to Laura Schroyer, sales rep at Lasting Impressions Event Rentals in Columbus, Ohio, the majority of graduation parties the company services are held at the graduate’s house. Opening up your home can seem daunting, but it’s better than forking out beaucoup bucks to the country club.
  • Consider the city. Contact your local city or county recreation department and ask if they offer any places for hosting get-togethers. Many have parks, pavilions or halls available to reserve free of charge or rent for a reasonable fee. These locations often include amenities, such as use of kitchens or outdoor grills, existing tables and seating, and various sports courts.

Bonus money-saving tip: Before renting tables and chairs from a rental company, Jason Rickey, University of Dayton junior and co-owner of Omar’s Party Tents, recommends asking a local church if you can borrow some in exchange for a small donation.

Best Graduation Party Decorations
Schroyer says decorating with school colors is a popular grad party trend: “They use a lot of colors from that college or different items associated with their college.”

  • Hit up discount chains and dollar stores. You’ll find inexpensive decor, like streamers and balloons, as well as color-coordinated paper plates, napkins and plastic utensils. Schroyer mentions that a simple way to make the decor pop is to use tablecloths in complementing colors.
  • Enlist the help of friends. Have any artistic kids in your crew? Pick up some poster board and paints, and have them create one-of-a-kind wall hangings. Your roomie has a knack for interesting dorm decorating on the cheap? Put her in charge of coming up with unique centerpieces.

Best Graduation Party Food
“Food is the main reason I go to graduation parties,” jokes Ohio State University sophomore Alex Huegle. Forget the caterer and go with some of these less pricey menu suggestions:

  • Cookout fare Tossing burgers and dogs on the grill is an efficient way to keep the food coming. And it’s not a cop-out to ask each guest to bring a side dish to share. Just make sure you know who’s bringing what so you have a variety and don’t end up trying to unload five buckets of potato salad.
  • Ethnic dishes Did you study abroad? Recreate dishes you enjoyed during your trek. If you traveled through Spain, serve gazpacho and paella (substitute expensive shellfish with just-as-delicious chorizo sausage and chicken — or even beans for a vegetarian option).
  • Dippity do’s Put out an assortment of dips, like artichoke, nacho or hummus, for guests to munch on. Be sure to provide chips, pretzels and cut-up veggies for dipping. This is the best way to go if you have limited seating, since guests can easily consume these foods while standing.

Also, don’t space on the drinks. Fill coolers (or a baby pool) with plenty of ice and bottled water or soft drinks.

And finally, no grad party is complete without a cake. If you’re feeling creative and want to forgo ordering the traditional sheet cake, be your own “cake boss”: Buy fondant and colored icings online or at craft stores. Or whip up cupcakes!

Best Graduation Party Entertainment
No need to hire a DJ to keep grad party guests entertained …

  • Turn up the tunes. Personalize your playlist by projecting your iTunes from computer speakers or your iPod from an iHome. Or try Web sites like Pandora.com or Grooveshark.com to personalize live streaming playlists. If you’re really going for the “wow” factor, ask your musician friends to perform as a graduation gift to you.
  • Play some games. To break the monotony of mingling, offer games for your graduation party guests. Set up a volleyball net, use your basketball hoop for some one on one or dust off the cornhole boards.
  • Create a slideshow. To save money on printing photos, scan old ones to your computer and combine with photos you already have. Make your slideshow using such software as PowerPoint or Movie Maker (look for free downloads), then connect your computer to a projector and let the good times roll!

Talk It up! Ever been to a particularly awesome graduation party? Share the highlights below!

college guidance, college planning, parenting

Top 5 Helicopter Parent Stories

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helicopter parents
photo by Michael Elins-Newsweek May 22, 2006

I made contact with Chip on Twitter last week when he retweeted a “helicopter parent” tip that I had given during a recent #CampusChat. Chip Timmons is the Associate Director of Admissions at Wabash College and I asked him if he had some “helicopter parent” stories he would like to share with my readers. He graciously agreed.

Greetings parents!

Let me begin with the following.  In all honesty, I really don’t mind “helicopter parents”.  I understand they’re heavily invested in their children’s college decision, but here’s where I think they need to draw the line. I’ll share what I believe is the best analogy I’ve used when talking with parents.

If you wish to hover over your student while he or she is in the water, that’s fine.  Let them learn how to sink or swim.  Allow them to float or drift.  You only need to lower the lifeline if your son or daughter is drowning.

Here are my Top 5 (plus 1 honorable mention) examples of “helicopter parenting” that I’ve encountered during my admissions career.

Honorable mention: One move-in day a few years ago, a father asked me who was responsible for making sure his son got to his church every Sunday.  Before I could answer (my reply would have been “that’s your son’s responsibility”), the dad felt the need to clarify that he meant his church, in his hometown, some 90 minutes away from campus.

5. Over our two-day Honor Scholarship competition, a mother drove 3+ hours to campus on the morning of day two to have a calculus/physics cram session with her son.  They met off campus at a local coffee house and I happened to find them while grabbing my morning coffee on the way to the office.  I will never forget the looks on their faces.  You would have thought I was a police officer who walked in on a bank robbery.

4. A mother was concerned about the quality of the laundry facilities on campus.  She wondered if we were equipped to wash the specific type of workout/athletic apparel her son preferred to wear.  Her son is a distance runner.

3. Speaking of sports…I coach my son’s 5-6 year old baseball team.  Parents will sometimes ask why “Junior” isn’t playing a certain position or why he bats #9 in lineup.  At that age, that stuff happens.  It’s pathetic, but it happens.  In high school, parents should not expect to “have the coach’s ear” or feel like they have a right to lobby for increased playing time for their son or daughter.  Some parents will be heard and get their wish, but I still feel it’s pathetic.  In college, there’s absolutely no place for that.  A parent once wrote to me saying “I’ve called and written to Coach Soandso to find out why “Junior” isn’t on the varsity, but Coach Soandso won’t get back to me.”  My response was “Don’t expect a reply from Coach and do “Junior” favor.  Stop it.  If “Junior” is good enough to play on the varsity, he’ll prove it with his play.  Are you going to call his boss in 5 years and ask why “Junior” didn’t get a promotion?”

2. How about when it’s the girlfriend’s helicopter parents getting in the way?  A student informed our office that after a conversation with his girlfriend’s parents, he decided to live at home and attend the State University.  His girlfriend’s parents didn’t like the idea of her driving at night or that far to visit him on the weekends. I’ve said this before “boyfriend isn’t a paying gig and it doesn’t go on your resume.”

1. My #1 isn’t a parent I worked with, but someone I know personally.  The daughter attended college in a neighboring state.  Said college had live video feeds from different parts of campus.  My friend knew his daughter’s class schedule and the route she took to classes each day.  He would check the video feeds to watch his daughter go to class and leave class EVERY day for EVERY class that brought her in range of the cameras. If she missed class or he didn’t see her on the feed, he made a call or sent an email.  He proudly shared this tale with me and you could have knocked me over with a feather.

I’ve listed what I consider extreme examples and one-time incidents of “helicopter parenting”, but in my opinion, even seemingly minor “fly-overs” can hinder the college search process for your son or daughter. When you attend a college fair or visit a campus, allow the student to do most of the talking.  By far, the most frustrating experience for me is looking a student in the eye, asking him (Wabash is a men’s college) a question, and hearing a parent answer.

My parting advice: If that little voice in your head is asking the question “am I being a helicopter parent?”, you don’t need to wait for an answer.  If you’re asking that question, you have your answer.

Follow Chip on Twitter @ChipTimmons

Wabash College is featured in Loren Pope’s Colleges That Change Lives

college planning, parenting, social networks

My Top 10 Summer Activities

 

I’ve had several parents ask me recently about activities I recommend over the summer during high school. Summers are a great time to take advantage of the days and make a future impression on your high school resume.

Here is my list of the Top 10 summer activities:

  1. SAT/ACT Prep–summer is the best time to spend doing some SAT prep and improving vocabulary. There are awesome sites online for this. Just check out my post Top 5 SAT Prep Sites.
  2. Scholarship Searches–Even if your teen isn’t a senior yet, it’s a good practice to do some preliminary searching to make note of qualifications and deadlines. Note: Look locally first. Local scholarships are less competitive and often easily earned. For some search sites, check out my post of the Top 10 Scholarship Search sites.
  3. Volunteer–Encourage your teen to start volunteering in his/her community. A consistent pattern of volunteering each summer looks great on applications and shows colleges that your teen is concerned about giving back.
  4. Get a job or start a business–Summer is a good time to make some cash for that college fund and also demonstrate responsibility. Many teens actually go the entrepreneurial route and start a business: lawn mowing, babysitting, tutoring, etc.
  5. Write–Probably the last thing your teen wants to do over the summer is write. But writing is good preparation for the college essay and the writing portion of the SAT. Journaling is a great way to do this and will also serve to spur your teen’s creativity.
  6. Make some preliminary college visits–I stress “preliminary” here since visiting colleges in the summer isn’t the best time to get a clear picture of college life. But it’s a great time to wander around and explore the campuses.
  7. iTunes University—iTunes University is an excellent way for your teen to get an idea of what college courses might be like. It’s free and there is a wide array of subject matter to choose from. You can access it on your iPhone or iTouch or by downloading iTunes on your computer.
  8. Start or focus on a hobby–Hobbies are great ways that your teen can stand out from the pack on his/her college application. But it needs to be consistent throughout high school.
  9. Spend some time on social media–You won’t have to pull their arms to get them to do this; but it needs to be focused. Have them spend some time on Twitter to follow some college tweets. They should also read some blogs from college students and perhaps connect with some on Facebook from the colleges they are considering. Check out my list of the Top 30 College Info Twitterers.
  10. Read–Yes. I know…I can hear it now…BORING. But honestly, reading is one of the BEST summer activities to enhance their academic success and improve their vocabulary. And if he/she likes Ayn Rand, there are several big money scholarships given each year for essays on her books!

What are your favorite summer activities with your college-bound teens? Do you have any other suggestions?

college planning

5 Dorm Move-In Mistakes


 

dorm life issuesIf your college-bound teen is headed off to college in the fall, they might be tempted to pack up their ENTIRE room and transport it to the college dorm. But before you start packing, here are some tips by Maria Moy for “The Real College Guide” that will save you some heartache on move-in day.

(P.S. Speaking from experience, DO NOT pack your teen’s entire room. It won’t fit; and it won’t help with the homesickness either.)

Losing sleep over the dimensions of your dorm room? Rest assured, you can survive — and thrive — in close living quarters. We tell you how.

Unless you were raised in a jail cell, your dorm room is going to seem way too small for storing all your stuff — and yourself — without frequent fits of claustrophobia. Upon moving in, you’ll inevitably find that your closet is too small and that you have to make hard decisions about what will actually fit in your room this semester (big-screen TV or roommate? Hmmm …).

Here are the top five mistakes to avoid when stuffing your stuff into a small space:

1. Leaving furniture as is By far, the biggest mistake you can make on move-in day is to leave the furniture where it is. You are totally allowed — with your roommate’s blessings, of course — to move it! And don’t be shy about trying out a few different arrangements. Often, there is a better way to position your furniture to at least give the illusion of more space and even privacy. Typically, pushing your bed and desk against the walls leaves an open area in the center of the room. Pushing bureaus back to back can create private nooks for dressing or sleeping (so you never have to wake up to eye contact with your creepy roommate).

2. Not using vertical space The sky (OK, ceiling) is the limit when you are organizing your room. Even if your desk doesn’t come with shelves, you can pick up cost-effective shelving units at places like Kmart and Target. Be sure your shelves are durable enough to support the considerable weight of your textbooks or whatever else you plan to keep on them — clothes, shoes or even people if the shelves are waist-high. If you have room, a full-out bookcase is great for storing groceries, cooking supplies and other dorm miscellanea. Or opt for wall shelves, which free up floor space but might not be as sturdy. Hint: Buildable cube shelving gives you sturdy flexibility and can be recycled for whatever space you find yourself living in next year. And you can shove a single cube at the bottom of your closet or on your desk for additional organization.

3. Overlooking under-the-bed space Don’t underestimate the amount of stuff you can store simply by cramming it under your bed. Baskets, plastic drawers and crates may help with organizing, but your best investment by far is a set of bed risers (aka sturdy stilts for your bed posts). These raise the bed so you can cram even more crap under there. Gotta love ’em.

4. Keeping a messy closet Accept that you will not have sufficient closet space, especially if you go to school in a climate where bulky layers are necessary. With this in mind, mess management is a must. First off, get a shoe rack. There is nothing more frustrating than being late for class because you spent five precious minutes hopping around your room in an epic search of your missing shoe. Your best bet for a shoe rack is one that hangs over the closet door. Stuff it with shoes and other random stuff like hats, gloves and toiletries. With shoes and accessories off the floor, you may be able to fit an extra bar for hanging or a small shelving unit for folded stuff. (By the way, don’t forget to bring — or pack your clothes on — clothes hangers. Your room won’t come with them.)

5. Bringing big stuff Be flexible about bringing larger items like couches, bikes and kayaks. These are nice amenities but may find a better home in your parents’ garage. If you’re able — and your roommate is willing — to bunk beds, some larger furniture may fit. Some schools let you loft your bed above your desk — an ingenius way to conserve space. If you’re looking into a loft, however, find out how high and sturdy it is before buying so you know it will fit and won’t fall. As for your bike, keep it locked outside on a bike rack. We’ve seen kayaks stored that way as well. Really.

Here’s a nifty little tool that might help: Design Your Dorm