For seniors, the New Year brings those long-awaited college decisions: deferred, accepted, rejected, and wait listed. One knowledgeable college counselor once told me, “I don’t like to call these letters of acceptance. I use the term—offers of admission.”

As a parent, I like that distinction. This alternative wording makes it easier to stomach those not-so-pleasant responses and help your college-bound teen work through the gamut of emotions that come when decisions arrive.

Your student may be the one receiving these communications from the colleges, but you feel every emotion they do from failure to excitement and everything in between. But unless you understand what each term means, it’s hard to know how to help your student (and yourself) with appropriate responses and proper action.

When the letters from the colleges (or online notifications) arrive, your student will receive one of four responses: deferred, wait-listed, rejected (declined admission) or accepted (offered admission). Once you understand these terms, you can determine what your response should be and how you need to take action.

Read more from Zinch: You’ve Heard from the Colleges–Now What?