Netflix recently released a documentary/re-enactment of the Varsity Blues scandal over college admissions. You probably heard the news last year about rich parents paying bribes to get their less than stellar students into elite universities. If you have the time, have a student heading to college, or are simply interested to see how the scandal unfolded watch the documentary.

As I watched I realized how much the media highlighted the celebrities involved and neglected to examine why this happened. The college admissions system is broken. Granted, there has always been those who benefit from huge donors, legacies and connections. But the overwhelming desire to get into the “prestigious” colleges has caused parents and students to step outside the normal boundaries and into illegal and damaging practices.

I won’t go into details about the sting, or the characters involved, but I think it’s important to focus on some take-aways from the documentary and also think about what we learned from all of it.

There is too much weight placed on elite colleges.

There are thousands of colleges throughout the country and even abroad that can deliver a quality education. In the end, it really does not matter where your student attends college. It matters what they do with the education they receive. It matters if they take it seriously and participate in all the opportunities available on campus. It matters what contacts they make and how they develop those relationships. But the college name simply does not matter in the grand scheme of things.

Teenagers are too stressed over college admissions decisions.

Some of the most dramatic portions of the documentary were students reading their admissions decisions. For those who were accepted, there was ecstatic joy. For those who were not, there was absolute devastation, to the point of absolute feelings of failure. These teens see this decision as the “be all and end all” of their future. As adults and parents, it’s our responsibility to teach them otherwise. Relieve some of the stress and encourage them to face rejection positively and move on to the colleges that value them.

Parents should never push a student beyond their own dreams and desires.

With many of the parents involved in the scandal, they moved forward without even consulting their student. They proceeded with the deception even after having concerns that their student wouldn’t go along with it. The parents wanted their children to attend a prestigious college for bragging rights. They wanted it so badly they were willing to circumvent the process by bribing someone to assure their student would be offered admission. This is a dangerous motivation for both parents and students.

Colleges put too much emphasis on standardized testing.

Another aspect of the scandal was that parents were paying a test proctor to take the test for their student. So much emphasis is placed on test scores, especially at the elite colleges, that parents were willing to pay hundreds of thousands of dollars to assure a perfect or almost perfect score. It’s long been argued that colleges put too much emphasis on test scores and not enough emphasis on the overall record of the student. With so many colleges going test-optional this year due to the pandemic, perhaps we might see more schools drop the test score requirement.

How can we make things better for our students?

We need to spend less time pushing our students and more time encouraging them. We must have conversations about what their dreams and goals are and focus less on what other people think. We must also stress that this is simply one decision of a lifetime of decisions and nothing is irreversible. Failure is a part of life and the lessons we learn teach us to make better choices in the future. And sometimes, what may appear to be the end, is really the beginning.

Colleges have lessons to learn as well. They should stop paying for prestige and rankings and spend more time on providing a quality education for students. They should look at te student as a whole and be objective in their decisions. For those colleges who continue to use these type of illegal tactics, this should be a warning and time to re-evaluate their methods.