If your student has been put on the wait list at one of their top-choice schools, take a deep breath—you are definitely not alone. Many families go through this, and while it can feel like you’re stuck in a holding pattern, there are productive and empowering next steps you can take together. Many students have been waitlisted at their dream school, this isn’t the end of the road—it’s just a detour.

Here’s how you can support your teen through the wait list process with clarity, compassion, and confidence.

1. Understand What a Waitlist Means

Being waitlisted means the college sees your student as a strong, competitive applicant. They like what they see—but due to limited space, they’re unable to offer admission right now. Whether or not your student gets off the wait list depends on how many accepted students decline their spots, and those odds vary by year and by institution. Some schools admit only a handful of waitlisted students; others admit hundreds. It’s a bit of a numbers game.

Parent Tip: It’s important to keep things in perspective. When one of my students got waitlisted, I reminded him that this wasn’t a rejection. It was a maybe. And in the meantime, I encouraged his parents to stay positive and keep excitement alive about his other options. Sometimes the school that wasn’t your first choice turns out to be the perfect fit—more on that later!

2. Decide Whether to Accept a Spot on the Wait List

If your student wants to stay on the wait list, they must formally accept their spot. This usually involves logging into the school’s admissions portal and submitting a brief form or statement. But before they check that box, it’s worth sitting down as a family and asking: Is this school still a top choice? Is it worth the wait—and the uncertainty that comes with it?

Parent Tip: Open up the conversation. When our daughter was waitlisted at a school she’d once considered her top pick, she surprised us by saying she’d actually fallen in love with another school she’d been accepted to. The wait list gave her time to reevaluate what she really wanted, and that clarity was a gift in disguise. Be open to changing preferences—it’s okay if the dream school no longer feels like the dream.

3. Write a Letter of Continued Interest (LOCI)

If your teen decides to remain on the wait list, this is their chance to re-engage. A Letter of Continued Interest (LOCI) is a short, thoughtful message to the admissions office reaffirming that the school is still a top choice. Your student should also include any meaningful updates—improved grades, awards, new leadership roles, or completed projects.

Parent Tip: Let your teen write it in their own voice—admissions officers can spot a parent-written letter a mile away. You can help them with structure or proofreading, but keep their voice front and center. And don’t forget to include their applicant ID number somewhere in the letter.

4. Make a Backup Plan (and Celebrate It!)

Even if your student stays on the wait list, they must commit to another school by May 1 (National College Decision Day). That means choosing a school, accepting the offer, and submitting a deposit to secure their spot. Think of this as Plan A, with the wait list school as a potential Plan B—not the other way around.

Parent Tip: Reframe the narrative. When your teen commits to a backup school, throw a little celebration—just you, a homemade cake, and some music. Make it clear that this school isn’t a consolation prize; it is the beginning of an exciting new chapter. That sense of momentum will help shift the mood from “waiting” to “moving forward.”

Final Thoughts

The wait list process is a rollercoaster—equal parts hope and uncertainty. As a parent, you can help steady the ride. Encourage your teen to keep options open, stay engaged, and focus on the future, wherever it may lead. And remember: sometimes, not getting into Plan A is exactly what makes Plan B so meaningful. A year from now, your student might be thriving on a campus they hadn’t even considered at first. And that is something to celebrate.

 Got a wait list story of your own? I’d love to hear how you’re navigating it—drop a comment or share your experience below!