Category Archives: admissions

admissions, mom approved tips, parenting

Tips for Dads of the College-Bound

August 24, 2015 Suzanne Shaffer 3 Comments

With all the advice for moms, one of my Twitter followers (@PeachtreeCP) chimed in: “What about tips for dads?” I had to respond, “I’m not a dad, so I can’t speak for them.” But, it occurred to me that I did know some dads, one in particular, my brother. Both his children went to college. His daughter had a relatively typical college experience. His son, on the other hand, always marched, and still does, to the beat of a different drummer.

When I asked my brother to share his best advice, man to man, he graciously agreed to help. Here’s his response, word for word:

I’m not sure where to begin. I assume that the dad who wrote you wanted advice about the college process. I guess I’ll just share how I approached this with Cameron. Since he’s not the typical kid, my approach was unique to him. But this is how I did it.

I gave guidance, but didn’t try to push him into my expectations for him

I stressed the importance of education while he was thinking about what to do after high school

I tried to show him how his interests (video production, photography, etc.) would be greatly enhanced by more education

I gave him permission to make mistakes and take his time in determining his major

I didn’t give him a completely free ride to college – we required that he have some investment

I encouraged him to get a job while going to school

I encouraged him not to get into debt with loans, but to pay as he could, semester by semester

I finally recognized that college may not be his thing, so I gave him permission to say, “I want to do something else”, then I gave him my blessing

In retrospect, I think we could have done a better job of setting him up for a better first year away at college. We found a garage apartment for him to live in, but he lived alone. I think it would have been a better experience for him if he had other roommates going through the same struggles at college.

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Cameron chose to get a “real life” education, self-taught on the entrepreneurial route. It has not been an easy path, but he has certainly discovered his strengths and weaknesses while learning much about himself through self-discovery. He’s working at a job in a field he loves: video production.

For all you dads out there, the key here, according to my brother, is to know your child, give guidance when needed, stress the importance of an education, and give them the freedom to explore their own path in life. The college prep process has it’s own set of challenges and fathers can provide that stabilizing influence and strong support their college-bound teen needs.

admissions, common app, Uncategorized

One-Week Online Common App Bootcamp

June 25, 2015 Suzanne Shaffer

Everyone knows the importance of the college application. Books are written about it, articles published, and seminars taught about how to complete it. One of my Twitter colleagues and an essay expert, Ethan Sawyer @CollegeEssayGuy, knows how to craft the perfect college essay and personal statement, and he’s offering help with an upcoming common app boot camp webinar.

If a private university or college is in your future, the Common App is your one-way ticket. You’ve got one shot at a winning application, and Ethan Sawyer, the College Essay Guy, is here to help!

Using the Secrets of Screenwriting to Write Your Personal Statement is his five-part webinar series for students and counselors that runs July 13-17.

In just five days, you’ll finish your:

First draft of your Common App main statement
Activities list
Additional info section

Plus you’ll get tons of tips and step-by-step help to conquer the Common App.

Click here for more info.

Can’t make a particular session? No worries: He’ll email what you missed.

Can’t afford it? Don’t worry, there’s a pay-what-you-can option.

Are you a counselor? You’re invited too!

Click here to reserve your spot.

admissions, mom approved tips, organization, parenting

The Summer Before Senior Year of High School (10 Tips for Moms)

June 23, 2015 Suzanne Shaffer 4 Comments

If your life isn’t crazy enough right now, it’s about to get even crazier. Once your child becomes a high school senior, your time is not your own. Anything and everything is focused on college. Your family (not just your teen) will eat, drink and sleep all things college. Before the year ends you will wonder how you will survive mentally, physically and emotionally. It will be a rollercoaster of highs and lows for both you and your college-bound teen.

We entered the beginning of my daughter’s senior year with anticipation and halfway through I began to think we would never survive. By the time she walked across the stage at graduation we were both exhausted. Senior year begins with a slow pace and amps up in January, culminating in a feverous pitch in April and May.

Here are some tips to help you keep your sanity and navigate the college maze productively.

1. Do the prep work

Get ready for the mounds of catalogs, test prep booklets, flyers and email reminders. Start your filing system now, before school starts. Set up an email account (firstname_lastname@gmail.com), purchase a small thumb drive for filing computer files, create a landing zone for all college-related materials, start adding tasks on a calendar (either a wall calendar or an app that can be synchronized with the family. Here are 5 Free Apps for College-Prep Organization.

2. Do your best to control your emotions

It’s going to be an emotional time for both you and your student. Angry words will be spoken if you don’t make a conscious effort to bite your tongue, count to 10, and take a deep breathe. You are the parent and your teen needs emotional stability during this time, not an emotional basket case.

3. Prepare for rejection

The upcoming year will most likely mean that your student (and you) will have to deal with rejection. It’s not personal, but you will feel like it is. I know it’s tempting to spew platitudes like, “Everything happens for a reason”, or “I know how you feel”, or “They didn’t appreciate you.” But the reality is, all the platitudes in the world aren’t going to remove the disappointment. Once the dust has settled, however, it might be good to offer some words of wisdom from those “in the know” about the college admissions process: The Truth About College Rejection Letters.

4. Decide what role you will take

Please. I beg you. Do NOT be the parent that shoves, manipulates, and actually does the work for their student. Be the parent who encourages, supports and offers help and advice when needed. Be a coach, not a bully. Decide before things ever get crazy to let your teen OWN the process, or “drive the car” as one admissions officer often told me.

5. Prepare for emotional outbursts

This is one of the most stressful times in your family. There will be emotional outbursts as the stress intensifies. Your student will say things she does not mean. You will lose your temper and wish you didn’t. Just remember that most of what is said is fueled by the stress of the process and when it’s all over everyone will breathe a sigh of relief, hug and move on.

6. Discuss the money

If you want to avoid disappointment when offers of admission arrive, have the “money talk” before your student applies to colleges. Decide what you can afford, what you will be willing to contribute toward the costs, and what you expect your student to contribute.

7. Accept there will be consequences to actions

Your student will most likely fail or mess up at some point during senior year. When she goest to college, your student will have to fix her own problems. Let her do it now, while she lives at home, and it will be easier for her once she is gone. Rescuing your kids all the time only makes them into dependent adults and colleges aren’t impressed with those type of students or the parents that come with them.

8. Be open and not pragmatic

Be open to any college choices your student might make. You will not be the one attending the college and it’s not up to you to choose for her. You can give your advice and direct her in what you think would be the best path for her; but don’t shove her toward your alma mater or toward a college with a prestigious name if that is not her choice. If your teen mentions a gap year, don’t panic. Gap years are becoming more popular and it might be exactly what your teen needs. Read this post for some insight on gap years: What Parents Need to Know About a Gap Year.

9. Don’t push-it simply won’t help

If your student is unmotivated, it’s not going to help to nag her and push her to do the college prep work. If there is one thing I learned with both of my kids (and clients), if your student is not invested in the college process she won’t be invested in college. Save yourself some time, money and heartache and wait until she is. If not, she can learn from the college of hard knocks (as my son did)–minimum wage jobs are the BEST motivator! Here’s a post about my son and how he finally saw the light: Motivating an Underachiever Toward College?

10. Enjoy the journey

This is an exciting time in the life of your teenager. She has worked hard and will be planning her future. You can be proud as well. Enjoy the next year, even when you feel stressed and overwhelmed. It will pass all too quickly and before you know it she will be walking across the stage accepting her diploma and heading to college in the fall.

admissions, college planning

Wednesday’s Parent: 5 Reasons You Should Not Rely on College Ranking Lists

June 3, 2015 Suzanne Shaffer

Every year the college ranking lists roll out: U.S. News-America’s Best Colleges, Forbes list of America’s Top Colleges, Princeton Review’s The Best 379 Colleges and more. Parents often use these lists to create a list of dream colleges for their student. These lists may be jumping off points, but putting too much emphasis on them can harm your student.

Here are five reasons you should NOT rely on college rankings lists:

Colleges and universities often cheat. Read this post from Lynn O’Shaughnessy about the cheating that goes on when colleges send incorrect, inaccurate and inflated data to the list makers. (Colleges and Universities That Cheat)
Rankings don’t measure what sort of job a college or university is doing to graduate its students. No list even attempts to measure the education students receive or the quality of that education.
Rankings encourage colleges to favor the rich. O’Shaunessy explains, “Many teenagers end up as collateral damage in the rankings race because schools that are more selective are rated higher, which encourages them to accept more wealthy students. US News awards schools which generate higher test scores and grade point averages from their freshmen. This focus on selectivity has been a boon for affluent high school students, who tend to enjoy better academic profiles. These teens can afford expensive test-prep courses and are more likely to have attended schools with stronger academic offerings.” The most elite schools boast that they reserve their aid to the families who need financial help to attend college, but most of these institutions offer admissions to a shamefully low percentage of needy students.
The rankings encourage admission tricks. The US News rankings favor schools that spurn more students. Colleges increase rejection rates by recruiting students they have no intention of accepting.
Rankings encourage debt. Rankings ignore how much debt students are incurring at the colleges. The colleges at the top of the lists are expensive and middle income students who aspire to these schools and are accepted are often forced to take out huge student loans in order to pay the high tuition. In this case, the prestige of the college often outweighs the cost in the mind of the student and the minds of the parents.

The bottom line: don’t rely on these rankings to create your college list. Create your own list by researching the data yourself. Websites like CollegeData and CollegeNavigator will provide you with data that is not inaccurately reported or inflated to rank the college higher on a list.

Read Wendy’s post: 7 Great Ways to Use College Rankings Lists

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Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety. Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

The bonus is on the fourth Wednesday of each month when Wendy and I will host Twitter chat #CampusChat at 9pm ET/6pm PT. We will feature an expert on a topic of interest for parents of the college-bound.

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from parentingforcollege to pocsmom.com and vice versa.

admissions, mom approved tips

Mom-Approved Tips: Student Behavior Can Impact College Admissions

June 1, 2015 Suzanne Shaffer 1 Comment

Did you know student behavior in high school can have an impact on college acceptance? The vast majority of colleges and universities use disciplinary records to help determine whether to accept or reject a student’s application, according to a new study discussed in an Education Week article.

The study, released on Friday, was conducted by the Center for Community Alternatives, a New York-based organization that advocates on behalf of students who’ve had prior court involvement. It found that roughly 3 out of 4 colleges and universities collect high school disciplinary information, and that 89 percent of those institutions use the information to make admission decisions.

The study, titled “Education Suspended: The Use of High School Disciplinary Records in College Admissions,” also found that half of all high schools disclose such information to colleges, even though they are not required to do so.

Is this discipline sharing fair?

Defenders of the use of disciplinary records in college admission decisions say it is an important way for universities to keep students with a history of behavioral problems off their campuses as they build incoming classes of freshmen. But opponents say high school disciplinary records have little predictive value, needlessly stigmatize students for infractions that are often minor, and reduce their opportunities for higher learning.

They also argue that the practice is a civil rights issue because of the well-documented fact that students of color and students with disabilities face disciplinary actions in K-12 schools at disproportionately higher rates than other students.

What are the implications for parents?

These findings make it even more critical for parents to begin creating students who respect authority and submit to the instruction and guidance of authority. In today’s world of helicopter parenting, it’s easy to step in and help students avoid the consequences of their actions. But that type of parenting only produces entitled children who rebel against teachers and school administration. Students should understand that the consequences of their bad behavior will quite possibly affect their college admissions options.

admissions, college guidance, Wednesdays parent

Wednesday’s Parent: What is a Perfect Fit College?

May 27, 2015 Suzanne Shaffer 1 Comment

What is a perfect fit college? When asked, “how do you determine if a college is the right fit?”, overlook all the emotional motives:

Your friends are going there
Your parents went there
You like the football team
Your boyfriend/girlfriend has chosen it
You want to impress your friends by the name
You want to stay close to/or move far away from home

Once you remove those emotional motives, you can concentrate on six criteria that will help you determine whether or not the college is a “perfect fit”:

A place you can afford.
A place that provides the academic program that meets your needs.
A place that provides the style of instruction that best fits your learning style.
A place that provides a level of rigor and challenge equal to your ability.
A place that feels like home.
A place that values you for what you do well.

You will notice that #1 is about the financial fit. Before you even look at 2-6, you MUST be the “voice of financial reality”. This will save you much heartache in the future. In an article on University Parent’s blog: Reality, fit and substance—The ultimate college list, financial fit is key:

Before your student gets her heart set, get clear on what your family can afford. Take half an hour to work through the “net price calculator” available on most school websites, or use the FAFSA4caster to estimate federal student aid. These tools calculate your family’s financial need — essentially the difference between the college sticker price and what the formula says you are able to contribute.

Net price calculators don’t assess potential merit aid — institutional money set aside for students based on varying factors like GPA, standardized test scores, advanced courses, etc. Some institutions include merit calculators on their websites; many do not. To learn how specific schools determine merit aid, don’t hesitate to call the admissions office and ask.

With net price and merit aid estimates in hand, your student’s list can be more economically viable. If you and she have assumed that private scholarships and loans will fill gaps, the amounts you are supposing are now clearer, and that’s a good thing.

Once #1 is addressed, you should encourage your teen to “chew” on each of those remaining and think about what it is they want to get out of a college education. College is more than bricks and mortar and a place to get a diploma. It’s a place where the mind is challenged, social interaction abounds, friendships are formed and a place your college-bound teen will call home for at least four years of their life. That “perfect fit” will assure your teen is comfortable, challenged and ready to learn.

Read Wendy’s Post: The Prime Relationship Between College List and College Fit

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The bonus is on the fourth Wednesday of each month when Wendy and I will host Twitter chat #CampusChat at 9pm ET/6pm PT. This week’s guest will be Jessica Velasco (@Admissions411) discussing college fit.

admissions, college guidance, college prep, Penn College

Degrees That Work: One College’s Best Kept Secret

May 12, 2015 Suzanne Shaffer 4 Comments

Imagine knowing when your student graduates from college he will have a skill, a high quality liberal arts education, and a job. Imagine a technical education with a liberal arts degree. Imagine your student doing a job he actually enjoys and is related to his major after graduation. Until recently, these claims did not seem possible—that was until I visited and met the students at Pennsylvania College of Technology.

After the first hour of my visit at Penn College I said, “This is the best kept secret in college admissions.” Why haven’t I heard of them? Why haven’t other colleges adopted this philosophy? And why on earth aren’t more parents aware of this college option?

This is no ordinary college. It’s a college with a national reputation for education that impacts real life. Companies support the college, sending equipment and materials for training because they know the college will train competent students they can hire after graduation.

This is no ordinary campus. From the day a student arrives on campus he begins to have a hands-on education. Students spend a significant amount of time practicing what they learn in class. The campus labs simulate real working environments.

This is no ordinary faculty. The faculty of Penn College are industry professionals. They have worked in these industries developing hands on experience, sharing that expertise with their students.

This is no ordinary tuition bill. Four out of five students receive financial aid to cover the cost of college. To top it off, this college is a bargain: tuition room and board for in-state residents is under $30,000 a year; out of state students pay just a few thousand more.

This is no ordinary degree. A Penn College degree combines a comprehensive liberal arts education with hands-on experience using advanced technologies. This is a real advantage for graduates, who have the experience upon graduation to go immediately into the workforce.

This is no ordinary technical college. From sports, to greek life, to student led clubs, to full on-campus housing, to a faculty and administration (right up to the President of the college) that can be found walking around campus, interacting with students on a daily basis, this college has it all. It’s just like any traditional college campus–but so much more.

These are no ordinary alumni. During their centennial celebration the alumni launched their Penn College Scholarship Campaign. They raised $6.4 million for scholarships, increasing the college’s scholarship aid by 165 percent from 2011 to 2014.

If this isn’t enough to cause you to schedule a visit to Penn College, take a walk around campus and look at the companies who support the college. Their banners and company logos are scattered throughout campus. These companies promise to employ their graduates, and most students have job offers before graduation. I spoke to students in the automotive fields, welding, aviation, and health careers. Every one of the seniors I spoke with were looking forward to joining the workforce in a career that they love after graduation with secured jobs.

In the next few months I will be showcasing Penn College and their Degrees That Work. At the end of the series, this college will no longer be “the best kept secret” in college education.

admissions, organization, Wednesdays parent

Wednesday’s Parent: Deadlines and College Prep

April 29, 2015 Suzanne Shaffer 1 Comment

The college admission process is all about deadlines. On May 1, students must respond to the colleges they applied to and were offered admission. This date is set in stone. If you don’t respond, your offer of admission will be passed along to a student on the wait list.

If you don’t stay organized, it’s easy to miss any number of critical deadlines. Missing those deadlines could cause dire consequences and change the course of your student’s future. The only solution to surviving the tremendous number of deadlines is to get organized early and stay organized all the way to the end. Here are a few tips to help with each phase of the process:

In the beginning of college prep

The first year of high school is the best time to begin the organization process. Start collecting every report card, every award, every volunteer certificate, and if you really want to be organized, every paper, especially tests. Get a file cabinet strictly designated for college prep and create folders for each category. For a great organization system, check out my Parents Countdown to College Crash Course.

In the middle of college prep

Sophomore and junior year begins test prep. Sophomores often take the PSAT (since that year it’s a true practice test) to prepare for the test that counts during their junior year. For these tests there are registration deadlines and test dates. You can use any number of calendar tools to keep track of deadlines: a wall calendar or an organization app. Using an app like Cozi helps the whole family stay in the loop and remind each other of the deadlines.

At the end of college prep

Senior year is when the most important deadlines kick in: the college applications, scholarship applications, the SAT/ACT tests, the FAFSA and May 1 deposit deadline. These dates are critical because missing even one of them can affect your student’s college admission. Use calendar apps, text messages, wall calendars and to-do lists to make sure you don’t miss them. Some test prep experts suggest you have a backup plan (register for a 2nd test) in case your student gets sick or something unforeseen happens. To avoid waiting until the last minute on any of these tasks, set your own deadline two weeks before the actual one.

We all dread deadlines. Some of us use them (me especially) to get motivated. But you simply can’t wait until the last minute during college prep. Trying to fill out the Common App at 11:59PM the night before it’s due will only lead to stress, mistakes, and sometimes failure to complete. There are no second chances with these deadlines.

Read Wendy’s post: 3 Step Plan to Make Deadlines an Asset

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admissions, college guidance, college planning, financial aid, parenting, Wednesdays parent

Wednesday’s Parent: Don’t Be Fooled

April 1, 2015 Suzanne Shaffer

Today is April Fool’s day. I have to admit, it’s not one of my favorite Hallmark holidays. I’m not much of a prankster and I always disliked being on the receiving end of a prank. None of us do. But colleges, all over the country, are pranking parents and students today. How? With the financial aid award letter. But don’t be fooled.

Colleges don’t back their admission offer up with money–if a college wants your student, they will back it up with a financial “reward”. No award indicates they are counting on your student declining their offer. Read this…

Colleges pack those letters with loans–a prank because every student and parent can get a student loan. Read this…

Colleges misrepresent their true cost on those letter–often leaving out expenses that should be considered and not giving the true cost of attendance. Read this…

Colleges “gap” students–they don’t award enough financial aid to meet the family’s EFC. This leaves a gap in the award and what the family has to pay. Read this…

Colleges consider it an award letter although there’s no award–even if all they offer is a student loan. That’s not an award. That’s not even an olive branch. It’s a slap in the face. Read this…

Be a wise consumer. Don’t be fooled by award letters. Do your due diligence and compare offers, crunch the numbers, and make a wise financial decision. Remember that part of the perfect fit college is the financial aspect. A college who won’t back their offer up with money isn’t a college you should consider.

Don’t be pranked by the colleges. I would never fool you; but Happy April Fools Day!

Read Wendy’s post: How a Joke Helps No Fooling College Prep

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admissions, college guidance, college planning

Tips for Getting Off the Wait List

March 31, 2015 Suzanne Shaffer

The life of a high school and ultimately college student is often filled with opportunities to navigate through new situations, learn new competencies and skills, and deal with problems that haven’t been faced before. Your chances of being successful and overcoming perceived barriers are entirely dependent on your ability to remain positive and take initiative to alter your outcome.

Take for example, the ever notorious college wait list. Students work hard to get advice from academic counselors regarding available options, explore different schools of interest, and work feverishly to complete the often rigorous process of applying. Then, the moment comes when you receive notification that you have been wait listed and will be contacted if and when any changes are made to your status. Rather than sit idly by, here are some proactive tips you can use to increase your chances of getting off the wait list a securing a spot on the college campus of your choice.

First: Know What NOT To Do

Have you ever tried to acquire a certain outcome only to discover your efforts have actually been counterproductive? In this specific situation, there are definitely behaviors that can come across as desperate, selfish, and even unprofessional which could potentially cost you an opportunity to become a student. These behaviors include:

Continuously contacting admissions counselors
Having your parents argue your case to the school
Compiling irrelevant or trivial messages and material to send to the school
Relying on gimmicks like gift giving
Recruiting alumni to write letters on your behalf

Second: Contact Admissions

An initial phone call to the admissions office may help reveal the reason you were placed on the wait list. Often, admissions staff is happy to talk with you and provide some insight into your academic standing. Once you have a better idea of why you were wait listed, you can make confident decisions going forward in your quest to be accepted.

Third: Be Informative and Honest

An excellent way to proactively move your way to the top of the wait list is to write a letter that clearly states your interest in the school, its extracurricular programs, and its relevance to your area of study. Be sure to include any updated information regarding awards you have received or recognitions you were given in regards to your academic successes. Speak with your school’s college counselors to learn if they have any insight; perhaps they’ve worked with students who have also been on your dream school’s wait list.

Conclusion

Your efforts to proactively work with the school staff will be far more effective than simply waiting and hoping for the best or being overly obsessive and making endless phone calls to argue and pester. With the right amount of determination, a professional demeanor, and a positive attitude, you may find success in working your way off of the college wait list.

Parenting for College

Category Archives: admissions

Tips for Dads of the College-Bound

One-Week Online Common App Bootcamp