Category Archives: college guidance

academics, admissions, college guidance, financial aid, parenting

Mom-Approved Tips: Insist Your Student Graduate in 4 Years or Less

 

Did you know that at most public universities, only 19 percent of full-time students earn a bachelor’s degree in four years? Even at state flagship universities — selective, research-intensive institutions — only 36 percent of full-time students complete their bachelor’s degree on time.

Nationwide, only 50 of more than 580 public four-year institutions graduate a majority of their full-time students on time. Some of the causes of slow student progress are inability to register for required courses, credits lost in transfer and remediation sequences that do not work. Studying abroad can also contribute to added time and credits lost when abroad. According to a recent report from CompleteCollege.org some students take too few credits per semester to finish on time. The problem is even worse at community colleges, where 5 percent of full-time students earned an associate degree within two years, and 15.9 percent earned a one- to two-year certificate on time.

graduate in 4 yearsWhat is lost when a student doesn’t graduate in 4 years?

MONEY! My good friend, and college counselor, Paul Hemphill of Planning for College put it into perspective recently. (See chart to the right). It’s not just the cost of the education that your student loses, but the earning potential over the additional year or years. Nothing speaks louder than cold, hard numbers.

What can parents do to ensure on-time graduation?

It’s not a difficult task, although the numbers might speak otherwise. Taking control of the process and making a plan will go a long way in ensuring on-time graduation

Show your student the numbers—Nothing speaks louder than showing your student a loss of thousands of dollars in earning potential if they don’t graduate on time.

Help them plan their major and degree plan, ensuring it can be done in 4 years—Help them plan, ask questions of their advisors, and have solid discussions about their career and/or major.

Encourage AP testing and dual-credit courses—With AP testing and dual-credit courses, a student can enter college with multiple credits out of the way. The cost of these tests and courses pales in comparison to the cost of a college credit and extra money paid if they don’t graduate on time. It’s conceivable that with the right planning, a student can graduate in less than 4 years.

Attend community college for the basics during the summer before college—Not only will your student get some courses out of the way at a cheaper rate, they will enter college with credits under their belt.

Use some tough love—Explain the importance of graduating on time and explain that you will support them for 4 years only. After that, the cost is on them. Nothing motivates a teen more than realizing they will have to pay for college themselves.

Below is a neat little graphic (courtesy of Paul Hemphill) breaking it down for you.

graduate in 4 years

career colleges, careers, college guidance, college planning, Uncategorized

Stay Employed With These College Majors

 

college majorsLook to the future and what do you see? Flying cars? Steampunk kids riding hoverboards? Downtrodden dystopias with Harrison Ford-alikes running around in long brown overcoats?

Well, while these visions of the future might never happen, one thing is certain – some jobs will be obsolete, so you have to make your education count.

It’s a tough call to make. But some jobs will always be vital, no matter what era we live in.

So here are a few future-proof college majors for you to study, whether we move into a glistening or a downbeat future.

The children are our future

Despite declining birth rates in the western world, the need to look after and understand the needs of children is greater than ever.

But that doesn’t exclusively lead you towards childcare. For high wages and the chance to work out your brainbox, try studying for a degree in child psychology. Relative to other medical fields, psychology itself is in its relative infancy, making the possibilities for unique advancement high.

Knowing the inner workings of a child’s mind will never go out of style.

Digital love

You can see the impact of the internet on businesses already. As high street stores close their doors and indie retailers struggle to stay afloat, internet giants like Amazon dominate the marketplace.

The future is now in the digital world. As the tech for the internet unfurls before us, the reality is clear – the net is going nowhere.

As such, there are now countless avenues of study for a life in the digital world. Web development, computer programming, app design, game design – the list goes on. Some colleges even offer the chance to study the cultural impact of the web on society.

Not only is the world of the web putting convenience at our fingertips – it’s giving us the jobs of the future.

Get arty

We’ve all dreamed of it in some form or another – wearing a beret on the south bank of the Seine, Paris, you pen your latest novel, pursing a cigarette between your lips and living the life of the moody artiste.

But the successful artist – be they pretentious poet, literary heavyweight, beard-stroking filmmaker or agent provocateur raconteur – is usually one in a million. Yet however precarious a career as an artist might be, it will never go out of date. While the modes of distribution might change, the need for art won’t.

A degree in fine art, illustration or any other creative subject, won’t guarantee you a job straight off the bat. However, many people learn to combine a side job with their artistic aspirations. Creation may not pay amazingly – but it’ll never age away.

college guidance, college planning, Wednesdays parent

Wednesday’s Parent: My Daughter Chose a College by Location

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college locationDoes location matter when it comes to choosing a college? For some students, it’s all about the location. For others, the location plays a key role in narrowing down the college list. My daughter chose a college by location: Boston. It was the number one factor on her college list.

Where did we start?

We started our search by creating a list of colleges in the Boston area. Because Boston is a college town with more than 100 colleges and universities to choose from we had a very long list—some in the city itself and some in the surrounding suburbs. We used the College Board’s site to start the search by location. Then we added other criteria like majors, college size, financial aid, along with other important statistics like graduation rates and student debt figures.

How did she choose?

Once we had the list, she did her research by delving deeper into the college culture, student population and acceptance rate. She chose some in the city and some in the surrounding suburban areas. Each of these choices met the other important criteria: majors available, merit aid awards, and graduation rates.

What did we learn?

We learned that it’s perfectly acceptable to choose a college based on location, as long as you delve deeper into the college and what it offers. We didn’t use location as the sole deciding factor, but colleges who were not in the desired area did not make the list. We found the perfect college for her in the suburbs of Boston—offering the major she wanted, the college size, and the merit aid she needed to avoid high student loan debt.

If your student seems to make an illogical college choice based solely on location, remember that you can work with it if you do your research and add the other important criteria.

Read Wendy’s Post: 3 Ways to Consider College Location

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Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety. Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

The bonus is on the fourth Wednesday of each month when Wendy and I will host Twitter chat #CampusChat at 9pm ET/6pm PT. We will feature an expert on a topic of interest for parents of the college-bound.

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from parentingforcollege to pocsmom.com and vice versa.

college guidance, college planning, college prep, websites

Campus Steps: A Free Resource for Students and Parents

 

campus stepsCampus Steps, the first free platform for students, parents and counselors to connect, communicate and navigate the road to higher education, launched recently. The company is being incubated by Campus Explorer, a leader in college recruitment technology in partnership with developers from Learning Core, which provides integrated school communication and content delivery systems.

Campus Steps addresses the nation’s broken college preparedness system. Nearly 75 percent of high schools lack online counseling technology solutions that can fundamentally improve the success of college and vocational school-bound students. For every 477 students, there is just one counselor and the average student receives less than 30 minutes of college counseling over their entire high school career. According to the American Psychological Association, high school students are now considered the most stressed-out age group with 80 percent of their stress related to workload.

“Students lack the critical support they need to find the right college or vocational school,” said Mark Eastwood, general manager, Campus Steps. “Campus Steps brings transparency and empowerment to the college admissions process. Just as adults use Linkedin to manage their professional profiles, our goal is for students to use Campus Steps to manage and track their academic profiles.”

Campus Steps hosts multiple online and mobile ready apps to easily allow a student to keep tabs of their academics, search colleges, apply for colleges and communicate with their counselor via text or email. The platform matches students to colleges based on a database of more than 8,500 public and private four-year universities, community colleges and trade/vocational schools, regardless of their academic level, socioeconomic background or location.

Key apps for students include:

  • High School Resume – Students track academic info and accomplishments with a mobile friendly, easy to use tool. The Resume Score shows where a student stands compared to the national average.
  • College Matching – Discover new colleges with the personalized matching technology.
  • My College Goals Manager – Students create a college goal list and manage their application process all in one place.
  • Student Resources – Articles, resources and guides answer all college related questions.

Campus Steps also helps counselors better manage their workflow through setting appointments, automated messages and tracking their students’ college search and application plans.

About Campus Steps

Campus Steps is the first free platform with powerful apps for students, parents, and counselors to connect, communicate and navigate the road to higher education. The platform currently has 150,000 users and democratizes access to higher education, regardless of a student’s academic level, socioeconomic background or location. Based in Santa Monica, Calif., the company is being incubated by Campus Explorer, a leader in college recruitment technology in partnership with developers from Learning Core, which provides integrated school communication and content delivery systems. For more information, visit www.CampusSteps.com. Follow us on Facebook @CampusSteps and Twitter @CampusSteps.

admissions, college guidance, college planning, Guest Posts

Mom-Approved Tips: Be Wise-Apply to Backup Schools

 

Being admitted into your first choice school is a challenge and not a guarantee. No matter how positive you are about your application, no matter how hard you’ve worked to be an ideal applicant, it is important not to assume that gaining admission to your top choice for college is a sure thing. But don’t get dejected or cynical! Here are three ways to increase your chances of being accepted by applying to backup schools.

backup schools
Photo Courtesy of Andre Lüd

Why You Should Apply to Backup Colleges

Rather than be overly confident or too doubtful during the college application process, try to balance your reason with your desire by applying to more than one school. The responsible way to deal with the possibility of being rejected from your first choice is to apply to backup schools. Applying to more colleges and keeping your options open will only increase your chances of being accepted somewhere. Since it is possible that you’ll get in to a backup school over your ideal school, it’s a good idea to take the time to consider several colleges that you’re interested in attending.

The Number of Colleges You Apply to Matters:

Application fees can be costly, but it’s a good idea to invest your time and funds on more than just a few applications. For most students, anywhere from 5-7 applications is a good number. If you under-apply, you run the risk of not getting in anywhere; if you over-apply, you may get overwhelmed and unable to complete the whole process.

Although quantity is vital in increasing your chances of getting in, the quality of your applications also affect your chances of being accepted. Many state schools have one application portal for every school location, which makes applying to more than one school easier. Regardless of whether you’re interested in public or private, try to apply to a manageable number of colleges without overexerting your energy.

Applying to the “Right” Colleges for You

When choosing backup schools to apply to, think thoroughly about major options, location, tuition fees, and each school’s unique application process. If you’re undecided about your major or open to changing it in the future, apply to schools that have many strong programs.

Even if you’re not adventurous, try to picture yourself living in more than one college town. Consider affordability and look for schools that have good scholarship or work study programs. Research what schools like in an applicant and how they accept students to see if you’re their ideal candidate. For instance, if you’re a poor test taker but have a high GPA or write great application essays, apply to colleges that rely more heavily on the latter.

Photo Courtesy of Minh
Photo Courtesy of Minh

Bottom line: widen your educational horizons by keeping an open mind. When you apply to several schools, you give yourself the opportunity to have a variety of options or the chance to be surprised by your acceptances. It’s likely that the “right” college for you picks you rather than you pick it.

Due to intense competition and circumstances beyond your control, you may not get in to the college of your choice or be able to afford it. If you’re serious about higher education and gaining a degree, then be wise and apply to backup schools. If you want to make the best of your college experience, be open and pro-active during your application process.

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Javaher Nooryani is a writer and editor based in Denver, CO. She has a BA in American Literature & Culture from UCLA and a Masters in English & American Literature from NYU. As a former private tutor and college prep advisor, Javaher is passionate about higher education and is happy to share her knowledge on CollegeFocus, a website that helps students deal with the challenges of college. You can follow CollegeFocus on Twitter and Facebook.

admissions, college guidance, college planning

Wednesday’s Parent: EA and ED–Just Get It Over With (and other reasons)

 

early decisionToday’s topic: applying EA (early action) and ED (early decision). It’s the first week of November and those applications will be arriving at the colleges. Granted, it’s a quick process to complete once school begins in the fall, but there are some good reasons to take advantage of these options.

Your application arrives with fewer applicants (you stand out)

It stands to reason that the bulk of the students will be applying regular decision, which falls in early January. If you apply EA or ED, your application will be at the top of the stack.

My colleague and good friend, Paul Hemphill, talks about the choice to apply early, in Applying to college: How early? Which “early”? “Applying early,” claim the authors of The Early Admissions Game, “provides a significant admissions advantage, approximately equivalent to the effect of a jump of 100 points in SAT-1 score.”

You get to cross that task off your list (and relax)

When the holidays arrive, your applications are complete and you can load up on all the sweets and turkey your heart desires. You can relax during the break and know that you are ahead of the game.

You get your acceptances early (and it’s done!)

ED decisions usually arrive in December. EA decisions arrive in January or February. You don’t have to wait until April when all the other offers of admission arrive. If you are applying EA, you have more time to make your final decision.

You can focus all your energy on scholarships (it’s all about the FREE money)

Now that you know you’re accepted, you can focus your time and energy over the next few months on searching for scholarships. You will need to pay for that education. And there’s nothing better than FREE money to pay for that huge price tag.

You can focus on your academics (don’t fall prey to senioritis)

You’re in—but that doesn’t mean you can skate through senior year. Colleges have been known to pull offers of admission. Final transcripts are important so use the extra time you have to bump up that GPA.

Read Wendy’s Post: Choosing an Admission Program is Like Buying a Mattress

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Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety. Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

The bonus is on the fourth Wednesday of each month when Wendy and I will host Twitter chat #CampusChat at 9pm ET/6pm PT. We will feature an expert on a topic of interest for parents of the college-bound.

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from parentingforcollege to pocsmom.com and vice versa.

college guidance, college planning, college prep, Uncategorized, Wednesdays parent

Wednesday’s Parent: Are You Afraid of College Prep?

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afraid of college prepAre you afraid of college prep? If you’re not, you’re one of the few. Parents, while excited about the prospects of college, are frightened by the actual process. What frightens them most? Any number of tasks: the overwhelming mounds of forms and paperwork, how to pay for the high cost of the education, being out of control and not knowing how colleges will receive their student, and the biggie—will your student be rejected.

In order to avoid giving in to the fear, you need to change your thinking. While colleges might give you the impression they have the power, they do not. It’s ultimately your teen’s choice for which college to apply to and which college to attend. It’s ultimately your choice which financial aid award you accept. You are the consumer. The key is in how your student markets himself to the college and how he takes control of the process.

Here are 3 tips to help calm you fears:

This is just another phase in the life your child.

In the midst of it all, it seems like an insurmountable task. It is all consuming and appears to be a “life changing” decision. Yes. College is important. But it is just the beginning of the choices your child will have to make in this life. And nothing, I mean nothing, is carved in stone. Wrong college choice? In the grand scheme of life, it’s not the critical. It’s the education that matters and how your child embraces the learning.

There will be a good fit college for your child—a college that values their contribution.

It’s not about the name, but about the fit. With a little research, a little coaching, and some digging, there is a college that fits your child like a glove. It may not be an Ivy (and probably won’t), but it will be the place they feel welcome and at home. Find that and you’ve hit the jackpot.

While there may be rejections along the way, there will also be many opportunities to learn life lessons.

No parent likes to see their child rejected. But it’s a reality of life. Everyone is going to be rejected at some point and the college process is no different. It’s how you handle the rejections that matter. It’s the life lessons you can teach them that will stay with them after they go away to college. And I say this with all certainty—everything happens for a reason. Sometimes College B or College C is a much better fit, and will make your child happier in the long run.

Once you’re done, you’ll be an expert and can help other set aside their fears. What is it Roosevelt said? The only thing we have to fear is fear itself (and of course college prep).

Read Wendy’s Post: 4 College Prep Nightmare Scenarios

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Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety. Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

Join @pocsmom and I tonight with a #WednesdaysParent version of #CampusChat at 9PM ET with guest Paul Hemphill (@vcollegeadvisor) of Planning for College, discussing the scary side of college prep.

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from parentingforcollege to pocsmom.com and vice versa.

admissions, college guidance, college planning, social networks

Mom-Approved Tips: Dressing Up for a College

 

When my kids were little, Halloween was for them. They dressed up in costumes and went trick or treating door to door. My how times have changed. It’s become a family event. Parties are planned, events are scheduled for the kids, and parents get involved in the festivities. Dressing up is part of the fun and also a necessary component of the Halloween celebration.

When applying to colleges, “dressing up” for a college is more than fun–it’s necessary. What do I mean when I talk about dressing up for a college? 

Show interest

Colleges want to know you are interested in attending. They don’t want to be just another name on your college list. They want to know that if you apply, and are offered admission, there is a good chance you will accept and attend. You can show interest by taking an official campus tour, connecting on social media, and meeting with admissions officer for an interview. Colleges keep track of how many times you have showed interest.

Market yourself

You’re basically saying “pick me” to the colleges. Although you are the consumer, the ball is in their court for the first phase of this process. Take every opportunity to market yourself to them. They want to know you and see what you have to offer their college community.

Make a positive impression on social media

Use all avenues of social media positively. Post pictures of your volunteer activities on Facebook and Instagram. Converse with colleges on Twitter. Set up a profile on LinkedIn and connect with colleges there. The key word here is POSITIVE.

Unlike Halloween, you do not want to wear a costume and pretend to be someone you are not. Colleges want to see the real you underneath the costume, not a version of a person you think they want to see.

college guidance, college planning, Guest Posts, mom approved tips

Mom-Approved Tips: Planning for an Informed College Choice

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college choiceBuilding off of the fabulous and informative articles about the economics of choosing a college featured earlier this month (Payscale’s 2015 College Salary Report and Mom Approved Tips: How to Choose a College), I want to share with you a simple system to help you make this huge decision and an informed college choice.

1. Schedule Time in Your Calendar to Implement the System

The first step in any system is scheduling time to implement it. Set aside an hour this week to start working through the following steps. This can be done as a family or by the student. The key to not getting overwhelmed by the process is taking it one little step at a time. Break down each task into small, easy to accomplish tasks, and you’ll be done before you know it.

2. Start with a Large List and Narrow it Down

You are much better off with a long list than a short list of colleges. Remember when you are deciding which college to attend it will have been three-six months since you were applying. A lot can change in that amount of time, so you want to make sure you have enough options to make the best decision. I recommend students have a final list of 8-10 schools. If applying to that many schools is a financial burden for you and your family, remember you can always request application fee waivers. You can do this my writing the college directly or check out the College Board or NACAC for more information on the standard application fee waiver requests.

To get down to those 8-10 schools, start with a much larger list. Put any school on the list that even piques your interest. Spend time browsing the net and talking to friends, family, teachers, and counselors. Don’t limit yourself. Just write everything down right now. You want to make a large list and then focus on narrowing it down by asking yourself the following questions.

3. What do you want to do after you graduate?

Do you have a particular career or major in mind? Spend your time researching the best undergrad programs. See which schools your dream companies recruit from. Are there intern or co-op programs? You can use the Payscale Best Schools by Majors list shared last week to help you. You can also look at rankings for different majors.

Maybe you are unsure about what you want to do after you graduate. That’s OK! You just might want to steer clear of very specific programs. For example, if you’re on the fence about engineering, you don’t want to have a list of exclusively engineering schools.

Look at your list and cross off any schools that don’t offer the major(s) you’re interested in. Put the schools with the best programs at the top of the list. Be sure to take a look at the companies that recruit from and attend the career fairs of the colleges on your list. Not many students or their parents do this, but it is probably one of the biggest factors for how easy or difficult your future job search will be.

4. What are the economics of your choice?

I specifically don’t want you to think about what your “budget” is or how much the college costs. You need to look at the whole picture. What sort of financial aid and scholarship packages do the schools offer? What are your parents able and willing to contribute? Use Katie’s advice to broach the subject. What is your potential starting salary? What are your potential lifetime earnings? WRITE IT ALL DOWN. Use this wizard to figure out how much student loan debt is reasonable for you. Use the Payscale information to get median salaries for different careers.

For example, if your dream job is teaching middle school, your salary will likely be in the $30,000-$60,000 range during your lifetime. So you need to consider if spending $200,000 on your education will be too big of burden. If so, cross those hefty price tag schools off your list.

On the other hand, if your dream job is a petroleum engineer for a big oil company, I would consider spending more money on a school with a strong program that has relationships with all the big companies over a school that’s cheaper but doesn’t have any oil companies going to their career fairs. Put the schools with the applicable company connections at the top of your list.

5. Where do you want to live and study?

Location, location, location. It can be a big factor in your enjoyment of college, the expense, and the ease of your future job search. It’s definitely easier to get a job in the city or area where you go to school. If you know you want to work in a particular city or region, check out the schools there. You’ll be able to build your network while in school, making the job search process a breeze.

Maybe you know you want to go to school in the South, Midwest, or Coasts. Keep in mind there are additional expenses if you go to school far from home (flights home, storage between semesters, etc.). Cross off any schools on your list in regions or cities you know you don’t want to spend four years of your life. Move schools in your ideal regions/cities to the top of your list.

6. Will I like spending the next four years there?

Are you big city or small town? Do you need to be close to family or want to break out on your own? Is Greek life important? How did you feel when you visited the school?

Do you have any friends or family who went to a school and loved it? If they have similar likes and dislikes to you, their opinion is very valuable. Ask them why exactly they like the school. Are their reasons important to you?

I had a mother ask me this very question. Her daughter visited a school and wasn’t crazy about it. This year her friend is going there and loves it, which is making her reconsider the school. Typically we’re friends with people who are similar to us and have similar likes and dislikes. I think your friend’s experience is actually more pertinent than a visit, especially if it was a visit you took during the summer. It’s hard to get a feel for a school by going on a campus tour when most of the students are gone. Ask your friend why she loves it. Even better, visit your friend at school if you can. You might even be able to catch a class or two with her. Use this information to cross off the schools where you know you won’t enjoy your time. Make sure the top 10 schools on your list are places you’d like spending the next four years.

Action Steps:

  1. Start your list today!
  2. Research schools based on majors/careers.
  3. Use this wizard  to figure out how much student loan debt is reasonable for you. Use Payscale  to get median salaries for different careers.
  4. Talk to people! Your friends, family, and mentors can all help you to decide on your final list. Just remember to ask questions to find out why they like the schools they like.
  5. Narrow down your list to the top 8-10 schools.
  6. Comment or email me with any questions. If you are looking for resources to help you craft the best application to get you into those 8-10 schools, get my four-step Base Brainstorming Workbook and 7-page GPA Boot Camp for FREE!

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Jessica YeagerToday’s guest post is from Jessica Yeager, a grad of Harvard and MIT, and a tutor and college coach for high-achieving students and their parents at Impress the Ivies. You can get her Base Brainstorming Workbook & GPA Boot Camp for free.

admissions, college guidance, college planning, Guest Posts

Mom-Approved Tips: How to Choose a College

1 Comment

 

Today I’ve opted to post an article written by a young woman who has worked as a financial aid officer and wants to spread the word about financial literacy and money management skills for college-bound teens. She has witnessed parents and students make some unwise decisions about college. She offers some excellent advice on how to choose a college.

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Choosing which college to attend is a family decision.  Rather, it should be a family decision.  Especially if the family (i.e. parents!) will commit to covering the college expenses.

What the Experts Say

There are a number of factors to consider when choosing a college.  Some experts suggest  considering the national college rankings.   Others recommend choosing a college by the potential debt it might incur.  The College Board’s Big Future suggests a number of factors to consider when choosing a college, including size and location.  Some experts recommend visiting the college, speaking to students, alumni and faculty. Others recommend getting to know the resources available at the college and speaking to the admissions officers.  There are TONS of things to consider when choosing a college!

Almost all of the advice out there suggest that the decision should be based on information gathered by researching – and there’s not much of an emphasis on getting input from the family.

choose a collegeTaking a Different Approach

During my time as a financial aid counselor I helped many families learn about the college costs – AFTER the student had already enrolled in the college.  At that point, the student is already invested in the school and so is the family.

Also at this point many of the families (both parents and students) had regrets about their decisions and felt that it was too late to change course – it was the middle of the semester after all.  They had regrets about not evaluating their ability and willingness to pay for the college costs BEFORE having made the decision to attend.  Ability to pay is important – but even if a family has the ability to pay, doesn’t necessarily mean they have the willingness to pay.  Are they willing to pay $65,000/year for a private college?  Are they willing to take on the debt?

In many cases, by the time families came to me to explore their options about how to finance the college costs, they learned that they had very few options to make it work:

  • Borrowing Federal Parent PLUS Loans
  • Taking out home equity loans
  • Using credit cards
  • Dipping into their retirement accounts

The families were able to move forward with these decisions, but they had many hesitations about doing so.  Taking out a home equity loan, for example, was a common option that families chose.  But they were very uncomfortable with the decision.  The result?  Families ended up compromising their financial goals.

I recall some families would come up with other creative options like selling their cars or getting a second job.  I especially remember speaking to a father who admitted that he “sold the family gold” (I had no idea this was common practice!) to pay for his son’s education!

These families didn’t realize what they were getting into. Parents wanted to accommodate their student’s decisions, but I could tell that they were uncomfortable with the limited options.

This is why I strongly believe that choosing a college is a family decision. Because, like it or not, this decision affects the entire family – especially if there’s an expensive private college on your student’s radar.  It’s best to stay involved in this part of the process; and to make this decision together and compromise if necessary.

Does this make you feel uncomfortable?

It’s weird, right?  You’re probably thinking that choosing a college should be the student’s choice, not yours.  You don’t want them to feel guilty about wanting to choose an expensive college over a more affordable one that would make your life easier.  And you definitely don’t want to stand in the way of your child’s dream college.  It might even feel like you’re overstepping your boundaries by wanting to be involved in the final decision-making process.

This is normal.  In fact, it’s so normal that we forget that this is even a thing!  It’s called individualism and it places more value on the individual rather than the collective.  Merriam-Webster defines it as, “the belief that the needs of each person are more important than the needs of the whole society or group.”  Individualism is so deeply ingrained in our culture, that we don’t even question it.  Today, I want you to be critical of this deeply ingrained mindset.

Think about the differences between Eastern and Western philosophies.  In Western cultures, we place more value on the self, on our individual talents and accomplishments.  Eastern cultures place more value on collectivism which emphasizes the importance of groups, like the family, community, state, or country.

I believe that there is value in both Eastern and Western perspectives – and it’s important to balance between individualism and collectivism.

Individualism is a philosophy that we live by everyday and we don’t even notice it.  I want you to notice it today.  And when the time comes, I want you to notice it as it relates to choosing which college to attend.

How to Have the Conversation

I’d like to offer just ONE tip for you to work towards making this family decision: Next time you’re discussing college plans, you can say something like, “You can go to any college you want, but there may need to be some compromises.  We’re a team and we’re going to have to work together to make this decision work.”  Bottom line: the best thing to do is be direct, honest, and offer your support.

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Katie's HeadshotAs a financial aid counselor, Katie has witnessed the lack of financial literacy among college students. That’s why she’s a big believer in learning money management skills early in life. Sign up for her newsletter where she shares tips about how to prepare your teen to make smart financial decisions: http://planningwithpoise.com/