Category Archives: parenting

How to encourage your high school student to consider an internship

From an early age, my parents always encouraged me to think about the parallels between student life and working full-time. “Just like it’s our job to get up and go to work every day, it’s your job to get up and go to school every day,” I vividly remember my mom telling me as a kindergartner. “And doing your homework when you get home at night is part of that job, too,” she added.

Looking back, it seems like a few trivial statements made by a mother to persuade her daughter to get out of bed for school in the morning. But it wasn’t insignificant. It helped my young, impressionable mind to recognize the importance in being a good student. I wanted to be a good student because it was my job to do so, according to my mother. Indeed, it was forward-thinking at its finest.

With that fundamental seed planted (you must get up every day and perform your job, whatever it is), when a child develops natural interests and skillsets, it’s time to hone in on the “whatever it is”. As teens reach the pivotal point in their lives of determining the career field in which they want to obtain further education and training, parents can have the same effect on their children as my mom did when she made that simple statement to her six-year-old. Little did she know her praise and support of my early passions would ultimately lead to my pursuit of a degree in disaster recovery.

Encourage your college-bound teen to investigate careers

Encouraging teenagers to investigate careers, if done properly, can set them up for success long before recruiters start showing up at their high school. No child ever really wants to grow up, so mandating they start thinking about declaring a profession will likely not yield a positive response. Rather than telling them to start thinking about college or figuring out what they want to do for a living, ask questions relating to a career that will provoke their curiosity and motivate them do initiate their own research.

For example, let’s say your teenage son has great language skills, is on the school newspaper editorial team, enjoys playing baseball, loves punk rock music, and appears to be dependent on his Twitter account. You could ask him if he plans to be on the newspaper staff next year. If he does, then he must enjoy writing. As a parent, you are surely in tune with what he’s writing about. So, if the newspaper has him writing about the school play, encourage him to seek permission to write about sports or music (two of his interests) instead. If the paper won’t allow him to change topics, mention a music or sports blog you stumbled across that you noticed was taking guest posts. Whether it’s with the school newspaper or on a blog, you’ve now guided him towards creative writing about subjects he enjoys.

Encourage them to take the next step

If it goes well and he likes it, as you praise him for the great work he’s been doing, casually mention what bigger and better things it could lead to- a music correspondent for an alternative arts publication, a field reporter for a local radio station, or video blogging for a local news station. Be persistent, but not annoyingly persistent, that these are real possibilities. Point out that those types of organizations need interns and that, if it’s something he could see himself doing for a career, that he could test the waters with an internship.

The point is that gentle nudging that provokes curiosity will, in the end, be much more effective than forcing internships if the student discovers on his own that his passion can become his career. Take an active interest in his activities and hobbies and encourage further development of those that could lead to internships and occupations. Drop hints and make suggestions. And most importantly- be supportive of their final decisions!

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This was a guest post contributed by Danielle Luna, a resident of Indianapolis, who blogs for Professional Intern (http://www.professionalintern.com), a website devoted to reading, literature, writing, and education.

Texting to Teach–Seriously?

If you asked most educators and parents to suggest possible new ways to help teenagers significantly improve SAT, ACT and AP test scores as well as overall GPA’s, “texting” is probably not one of the first (or second or third) things that would come to mind.

After watching my teenage daughter on a car trip texting faster than I could think, it dawned on me that I needed to find a way to make text messaging (SMS) productive and not just social. And as most parents can relate, it would also be nice for text messaging to be anything other than a dinnertime distraction!

Consequently, the concept of eTextPrep came to life when I realized that the cell phone was the prefect way to help teens be more successful in school. I also knew that by utilizing the method of communication that teens know and love, text messaging, we could capture any student’s attention long enough to explore some great new learning opportunities.

Recent statistics show that the average teenager spends 88% of their time on their cell phone texting, not talking, and that number is on the rise. So to have an educational tool that fits into the teen “LOL, OMG, JK” lingo of brevity above all else is a great step! Studies indicate that the majority of teens not only have a cell phone but as most parents know, it is never far from their side!

The educational benefit behind eTextPrep is really very simple. Critical vocabulary words and terms applicable to the SAT, ACT and AP tests are sent directly to the student’s cell phone two specific times each day. With studies showing 98% of text messages are opened and read within four minutes of receipt, I knew the educational texts could not be ignored.

Remaining cognizant of the busy schedule of most teens, eTextPrep is designed so that the student simply has to open the text message, read the word, the part or speech or origin and finally, the definition. There is nothing for them to initiate or remember to do, just open the message and learn! eTextPrep is a great example of the growing acceptance in the education community that with today’s technology, learning can in fact be “anywhere and anytime.”

As the mother of four teenagers, I knew that in addition to really engaging students in learning, in today’s challenging economy, eTextPrep needed to stay affordable. eTextPrep is both – a very effective learning tool for the student and at only $7.99 per month is affordable to the subscriber.

At eTextPrep we are raising test scores and GPAs – one text at a time – every day.

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Today’s guest post was contributed by Lynne Anderson, President and CEO of ETextPrep. The educational content for eTextPrep has been designed by highly experienced and nationally recognized educators. Veteran teachers who instruct, test, tutor and grade the courses have authored material that is challenging, highly specific and adheres to rigorous course standards and requirements. eTextPrep AP Learning Programs include words and concepts students will see again on AP test day!

eTextPrep utilizes the mobile medium students know and love – their cell phone – and puts the power of learning in the palm of their hand.To learn more about the concept of Texting to Teach visit our website at www.etextprep.com, email info@etextprep.com or call 888-553-8398 to learn more.


Parents–Advise, but don’t invade!

Most parents would like to be involved in their child’s college selection process.  Sometimes it’s hard to know how much is enough, though.  From my perspective as a student, it’s best to monitor and advise, but not to invade.

I am the youngest of three children, so my parents were pros when it came to college admissions.  If you are experiencing your first child going off to college, that’s a whole other ball game which may require more planning and research.  No matter what, keep in mind that this decision affects your child more than it affects you, so let them make the final decision.

My parents had a tactful strategy. They had several early conversations with me about what I found important in a potential school.  These aspects generally included a strong marketing program (my major), plentiful extracurricular opportunities, and a comfortable campus with an active & social student body.  My parents would share their concerns, which included campus safety, finances, distance from home, etc.

Once they knew that I had listened to their point of view, I was free to research any schools I wanted. I came up with a list of around fifteen schools and eventually narrowed that down to the six that I would apply to.  As soon as I had my finalists, my parents went into hyperdrive.  They made lists, spreadsheets and poster board-sized charts about the benefits and drawbacks of attending these schools.  They helped me rank my schools into ‘reach schools,’ ‘safety schools’ and the ones that fell somewhere in the middle.  Finally, my dad accompanied me on a trip to the east coast to visit a couple of them.

Ultimately, I decided to attend Syracuse University, a choice that my parents and I were equally comfortable with.  My mom swears that after all the time she spent looking into other schools, she “always knew I would go to Syracuse.”

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Adam Britten is a senior at Syracuse University majoring in Marketing Management.  Follow him on Twitter @AdamBritten.  Read his previous post on this blog, “The most important questions to ask a campus tour guide.”

Parenting college-bound teens without pushing

 

It’s hard. I know. I’ve been there. You want your kids to have the BEST education available. You want them to want it as much as you do. You see them making some choices that you know they will regret. As hard as you try, you find yourself pressuring them to make the right choice and the battle lines are drawn. They dig their heels in. You dig your heels in. And the tug of war begins.

What’s a parent to do when they feel their college-bound teens are making the wrong choices related to college? Take a deep breath and read these examples (along with my suggestions)–

Your college-bound teen tells you he doesn’t want to go to the college that is hard to get into and is opting for what you consider to be sub par.

Don’t panic or overreact. It’s possible he is scared. Try and ascertain the reasoning behind the decision. Don’t do this by badgering him or constantly asking him why. The best way to figure out what is wrong is to LISTEN. Listen to him talk about his day, about college, about how he feels. If fear is not the reason, perhaps he feels the other college would be a better fit. If that’s the case, do yourself a favor and back off. The worst thing you can do with a teenager is force him into a decision he feels is wrong. Sometimes the best lessons we learn are the ones that come from making our own decisions (right or wrong).

Your college-bound teen tells you that he simply MUST go to Private College A, even though she knows it comes with a high price tag.

Don’t let her bully you into sending her to a college you can’t afford AND one that will require a tremendous amount of student loan debt. Sit her down and explain to her the dangers of graduating in debt. Use the college repayment calculators if you have to. If she truly wants to go to Private College A, she needs to do the work (good grades, good SAT/ACT scores, great essay) to be awarded scholarship/grant money from that college. If not, there are always other options and choices.

Your college-bound teen is not interested in college, deadlines, studying for the SAT or any other path that leads him toward higher education.

If there is one thing I learned with both of my kids (and clients), if they aren’t invested in the college process they won’t be invested in college. Save yourself some time, money and heartache and wait until they are. If not, they can learn from the college of hard knocks–minimum wage jobs are the BEST motivator!

Your college-bound teen misses deadlines, panics and comes running to you at the last minute to fix it.

The simplest way I know to avoid missing deadlines, is to get yourself a huge wall calendar and a fat red marker. Put it in a place that they have to pass by every single day. In addition, with all the smartphones and calendar apps available today, missing a deadline should be a thing of the past. At some point (hopefully when they go to college), they will have to fix their own problems. Let them do it now, while they live at home, and it will be easier for them once they are gone. Rescuing your kids all time only makes them into dependent adults and colleges aren’t impressed with those type of students or the parents that come with them.

Your college-bound teen suddenly announces she is not ready for college and wants to take a year off.

First of all, wait. Don’t react. Just listen. Odds are the mood will change with the wind and once all her friends are making college plans, that desire that she once had will kick back in. If not, let her know that it won’t be a “free-ride” year. She will be expected to work and save the money she makes for college.

If you have any questions or personal experiences you would like to share, please leave a comment here and share it with other parents. We learn from each other and from our mistakes and successes!

Disclaimer: These are my “suggestions”. I don’t claim to be a parenting expert, just a parent who has faced these same problems and learned from them. Take my wisdom as you will and realize that every family dynamic is different.

Tips for Helping Your College-Bound Teen Reduce Stress

Is your college-bound teenager feeling stressed about going to college? Let your teen know he or she is not alone; it happens to a lot of college-bound teenagers. Teens feel stressed when they perceive a situation to be difficult, dangerous, or painful. Those going off to college often worry about finding new friends, fitting in with the college crowd, being away from home, getting good grades, and a number of other issues. What can parents do to help? Here are some tips to help your teenagers get rid of stress:

  • Listen: Ask what’s bothering them. Listen and don’t be judgmental. Allow your teenagers to express their opinions.
  • Provide emotional support: By showing your teenagers you care about their feelings, they will feel more connected to you. Don’t criticize or trivialize their stressful feelings. They may seem to be overstressed about about going to college, but remember that teens don’t have the same perspective as adults. Provide reinforcement by giving compliments.
  • Realistic expectations: If part of the stress is due to expectations of grades, be realistic with them about your own expectations of their grades.
  • Support: Encourage teenagers to spend time with friends and relatives who provide positive reinforcement. Friends can help keep your teenager happy and motivated. College students or recent college graduates can be helpful. They can put things in proper perspective and talk about the good times they had while attending college.
  • Be positive: Remind your teenager that these anxious feelings will go away. Encourage your teen to look at the fun aspects of attending college.
  • Teens expressing themselves: Creative activities such as painting, drawing, dancing, and singing reduce tension.
  • Exercise: Exercise releases hormones in the body which lower stress levels. Yoga and meditation relieve stress. Some experts believe sunlight relieves stress. Sunlight is important for the body’s regulation of chemicals, so exercising outdoors is a good option. Also, stressed teens should avoid caffeine drinks.
  • Sleep: Make sure your teen goes to bed early enough to get a good night sleep.
  • Volunteering: Helping other people can help your teen stop worrying about himself.
  • Relaxation: Breathing and muscle relaxation techniques can help your teenager relax.

Stress is a common problem for college-bound teenagers. By addressing the problem and taking action you can help your teenager get rid of stress.

Online Resources

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Brian Jenkins has been writing about a variety topics helpful to college students for BrainTrack since 2008. For more information about BrainTrack, visit our Facebook page.

Smart Spending (and saving) for college students

It’s never too early to teach our kids to spend smart and save. If you get them in the habit before they go off to college, it’s much easier for them to see the value once they are away from home. Today’s post by Real College Guide gives us some good ways to teach our kids to save, even if they aren’t in college yet!

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Being a college student used to mean eating three packs of ramen noodles a day and biking around campus because gassing up your 1985 Chevy was too expensive. Whether you work a part-time job or get an allowance from your parents, you can learn some key concepts to saving and spending wisely — now and after college.

Smart Spending
There are plenty of ways to save a few bucks every day. Dr. Dick Verrone, personal-finance professor for the Cameron School of Business at the University of North Carolina, Wilmington, has these penny-pinching tips:

  • Order water. Don’t get soft drinks when you’re eating out. Why pay $2 for 150 soda calories? Also, Verrone says, “Never order orange juice.” OJ is extremely overpriced at restaurants, and most of the time it’s from concentrate.
  • Limit your pocket cash. When going out on the town, take a 20-spot, and leave your cards at home. You’ll be forced to keep your tab under $20.
  • Buy quality clothing items. They may be a little more expensive, but they’ll last longer. Verrone also definitely approves of outlet shopping. But before making purchases, think: Do I need this? If not, don’t buy it!
  • Switch your prescriptions. Change your name-brand medications to generic ones. You can usually save about $20 per med this way.

Clipping “Coups”
OK, most college students don’t have easy access to a daily paper or coupon flyer, so how do you save with coupons and special discounts?

  • Look online. If you’re going to the sporting-goods store, for example, type the name of the store into the search engine, along with the words coupon codes. Lots of websites track down discount codes for online shopping, as well as printable coupons for buying items in-store.
  • Sign up for discount alerts via text. Some campuses have local text-message discount services — check at your student center or information desk. (Of course, this is not a good idea if you don’t have an unlimited cell-phone plan.) Mike Meyer, a UNCW senior, is signed up for deals in North Carolina at CouponstoYourPhone.com. “Every Monday, I get a coupon-text for one of my favorite restaurants,” he says. “It’s awesome.”
  • Purchase a coupon book. These books pack hundreds of coupons, usually for buy-one-get-one-free offers. They’re worth the $25 (if you buy one from a campus organization’s fund-raiser) or even $35 (available online at Entertainment.com) after just a few uses.

Long-term Saving
Verrone recommends getting into the habit of saving now to set yourself up for an easier financial situation after graduation. “Make the amount small enough so you can do it,” he says, such as saving $5 per week or $10 each month.

  • Set up an automatic transfer. Most large banking institutions, such as Bank of America or Wachovia, will let you set up transfers between linked checking and savings accounts. Meyer has $30 a month transferred. “That’s how I saved money for spring break freshman year,” he says.
  • Start an individual retirement account. No, you’re not too young! This is the time to do it. “Once you’ve accumulated $200 to $300, open a Roth IRA and continue to fund it every month from your savings,” advises Verrone. Even if you continue to only save that $10 per month, you’ll be accumulating real money for the future.
  • Watch your money grow. Let your savings work for you by investing in mutual funds with low expenses and superior performance records, suggests Verrone. Consult a financial adviser at your bank for more information.
  • Consider an online banking service. Having an online bank can be a good outlet for putting away large sums of money that you can still access without penalties (unlike with an IRA). Online banks usually provide higher interest rates, although transfers take two to three business days. Meyer has a savings account with INGDirect and loves it: “A two-day transfer is more of a commitment, so I have to really think about it before I make that decision.”

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This article was written by Ocean Gildee for The Real College Guide and is made available to Parents Countdown to College Coach through a partnership with The Real College Guide.

Parenting is NOT for cowards!

Recently I received an email from one of my list subscribers telling me that parents want more than the facts, they want the DETAILS. Then I received an email from a distressed parent, concerned that her son was making the wrong college choice and she wanted to know what to do and how to react.

Let’s face it: parenting is NOT for cowards! Just when you think you have the terrible two’s figured out, along comes grade school woes (and all it entails), middle school trauma (with puberty), and high school drama (with the college admissions process thrown in for good measure). I had a friend who once told me, “potty training ain’t NOTHING compared to parenting a teenager!” She was right!

Parenting is in the details; and knowing where to find those details is often hard. That’s why I created my Parents Countdown to College Coach blog. It’s here to help you find those details; because it’s impossible for me to provide every detail for every question you might have. But, I’ve gathered a wide network of experts to help you find those answers and fill in the blanks where I can’t. If you’re a smart parent (and I know you are) you will utilize each and every one of these resources to help you with all your questions.

Watch my blog over the next few weeks when I feature my favorite college experts and tell you why I think they are BETTER than Santa’s helpers!

And if you’re one of those parents that want ALL the information right at your fingertips, you can find it in my Parents Countdown to College Toolkit.

My Top 10 Posts–Helping Parents Parent

 

After reading Chris’ guest blog post on Character (The #1 Key to Success in College), I felt it might be prudent to bring back my “best of the best” posts specifically directed toward helping parents parent their college-bound teens. Feel free to pass the link along to other parents (pretty please????).

1. Is college just about ROI?
https://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/11/is-college-just-about-roi/

2. 10 concepts your teen should learn BEFORE college
https://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/04/10-concepts/

3. Top 10 things every parents should know about “hooking up” in college
https://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/04/hooking-up-in-college/

4. Motivating an under-achiever toward college
https://www.parentingforcollege.com/2009/12/motivating-an-underachiever-toward-college/

5. Top 10 Do’s and Don’ts of parenting a college-bound teen
https://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/05/parenting-college-bound-teens/

6. Top 10 Questions parents ask about college
https://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/06/top-10-questions-parents-ask-about-college/

7. Being realistic about college debt
https://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/06/being-realistic-about-college-debt/

8. Being a parent college coach: the three C’s
https://www.parentingforcollege.com/2009/05/being-a-parent-college-coach-the-3-cs/

9. Preparing your teen for college
https://www.parentingforcollege.com/2009/05/preparing-your-teen-for-college-its-all-about-guiding-not-doing/

10. Six Campus Safety talking points
https://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/05/campus-safety/

College Access and Opportunity Guide—A Review

The Center for Student Opportunity created the College Access and Opportunity Guide to help low-income and first generation college-bound students make their college dreams become a reality. As a parent, I found this guide informative and helpful in providing direct information about the college admissions process.

There are helpful tips on how to stay involved in the college process without overstepping your boundaries. The guide clearly sets out the steps to take from beginning to end, along with insider advice from college students and other experts. There is clear discussion about loans, scholarships and how to find the perfect fit college. Also included is an excellent section specifically directed towards parents helping them to listen, encourage and how to let their college-bound teen handle the process by guiding them through the process.

But the real meat of this guide is the college specific information. The guide features 284 colleges and universities highlighted for their outreach efforts, financial aid opportunities and student support services. Instead of focusing solely on the numbers, this guide helps students locate and find important programs at each school that can help prepare for college (Access Programs), locate schools that provide financial incentives for admitted students (Opportunity Programs), and support services for college students to help them persist to graduation (Success Programs).

Each of these colleges is committed to supporting first-generation, low-income, and minority students on their campus and in their community. Profiled colleges are included in light of the programs and opportunities they present for this group of students.

If your college-bound teen falls into this group who want to make their college dreams a reality, you should pick up a copy of this simple-to-read and understand guide.

For more information about the Center for Student Opportunity you can visit them on their website at www.csocollegecenter.org.

The Number One Key To Success In College

What is the primary key for your kids to succeed in college?

grades – avoiding procrastination – passion – friends-scholarships – study time – lots of beer (just kidding…although some kids think that)

Here it is parents!  Get out your journal, grab a pen…you don’t want to miss this one!

CHARACTER

M-W.com definition of character: moral excellence and firmness <a man of sound character>

Chris Spradlin’s definition of character: “Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking.”Jackson Browne actually said this!

As parents we can teach our kids to make great grades, to be on time, we can instill passion deep into their souls, encourage them to make great friends and study.  But the single greatest asset that we can deposit deep into our kids heart is Character.

As our kids enter college we must encourage them to exhibit character in the following areas…

  • Study Ethics: I remember that my toughest subject my freshman in College was Algebra.  To be honest, I am just not that bright when it comes to math.  How did I make it through?  I cheated my entire way through the class.  I never built a math foundation for my remaining years; therefore I struggled through all four years of College.  Parents, we must teach our kids to walk in character when it comes to study ethics.  We must teach them to work hard, study hard, ask questions, join study groups; but at the end of the day, we must teach our kids that it is much better to take a low grade than to cheat.
  • Honoring The Gift: Many students today expect that they will attend college.  I believe that is a good expectation but that parents should help them understand that attending college is a gift!  In the world we live in today many students can’t afford college, don’t have the grades to get into college or don’t have their families help to make it into college.  I believe that parents should teach their kids to walk through the college doors with thankfulness and humility!  That each time they enter a class or extracurricular activity that they should recognize that attending college is a gift other kids don’t have and to honor it.
  • Contributing Financially: I know that this can be a controversial subject for some, but I strongly believe that by asking a student to contribute financially in some form or fashion…this creates ownership in the college experience.
  • Free Time: One of the biggest lessons that I have learned in my life is when a mentor of mine sat me down, looked me in the eyes and said, “Chris, I want you to know that life is not all about you”!  The reality is that most kids enter college and they are the star of their own show, life is about them…their grades, their friends, their fraternity and their social life.  I believe that parents should teach their kids that, “life is not all about them”.  Parents should teach their kids to use their free time to serve others.  Encourage them to serve in a soup kitchen, serve in a local religious organization, mentor a struggling student or befriend someone who is having a tough time with the college transition.

I believe the number one key to success in college is character. Parents, we must take the time to live this out and deposit character deep into the heart, soul and mind of our kids and then they will be truly successful.

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This guest post was contribured by Chris Spradlin, the founder of www.epicparent.tv.  According to Chris: “I didn’t launch epicparent to showcase my parenting skills, but rather be honest about my failures, wounds, wins and my journey as a parent.  I absolutely love honest, authentic, on-the-edge, innovative, entrepreneurial, get-your-hands-dirty parenting. I believe that if parents would step into their God-given role, the world would be changed!”