Category Archives: Uncategorized

Wednesday’s Parent: Top 5 Essay Posts for Parents

 

essayThe essay. Believe it or not, it’s a topic covered in teen angst shows—and when it’s covered, the parents end up writing the essays for their students. Why? Because the students are usually dreading, dreading, dreading writing the essay. And on top of that, they have no idea what to write or how to write it.

Apart from writing the essay yourself (you know you’re tempted—but resist with everything that is in you) here are some essay tips you can pass along to discreetly and subtly to your college-bound teen.

Answering the Common App Essay Prompts

The big idea here is that the story you want to tell matters a lot more than the prompt you attach to it. Most stories are about more than one thing, so yours might be about identity and failure, or about contentment and coming of age. So write the story first, and then figure out how to pitch it to an admissions committee. Having said that, it’s still useful to understand the questions.

5 Topics to Avoid in the College Application Essay

There’s a reason why schools require students to include essays, and it’s not just to see a sample of their writing ability. With thousands of applicants sporting similar qualifications and too few spots to accommodate them, something has to tip the scales, and it just might be the essay section. Picking the wrong one could mean getting a rejection letter. So here are just a few topics that students may want to steer clear of,

10 Tips for Writing More Competitive College Application Essays

With college admissions season in full swing, students nationwide are beginning to prepare their applications. While many of the academic elements like GPA, class rank and SAT score are set, one part of the application that students still exercise control over are the essays. To help students write competitive essays that will help get them noticed by admissions officers, Veritas Prep, the largest global provider of test prep and admissions consulting services, teamed up with Application Boot Camp®, America’s top college consulting firm, to offer ten tips students should follow as they draft their college application essays,

The College Essay Demystified

College essays go through many lives.  You will write, re-write, and re-write again, over a period of weeks or even months.  Inspiration can hit at any time.You want to have lots of time for your essays to percolate, to have those magic light bulb moments, or maybe even to wake up in the middle of the night from a dream and write a brilliantly creative essay (this really does happen!).

12 Essay Experts on Twitter

These twitter accounts are essay coaches—they help you write your OWN college essay by providing encouragement, guidance and support throughout the essay writing process. Follow them for tips about the essay and connect with them if your student needs help.

Read Wendy’s Post: Best Questions for Parents to Ask to Help with the College Essay

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Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety. Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

The bonus is on the fourth Wednesday of each month when Wendy and I will host Twitter chat #CampusChat at 9pm ET/6pm PT. We will feature an expert on a topic of interest for parents of the college-bound.

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from parentingforcollege to pocsmom.com and vice versa.

 

Scholarship Friday: 10 Tips for Your Scholarship Search

 

scholarship searchScholarship searching is an art. It requires a commitment of time, energy and perseverance. As in any worthwhile pursuit there are tips to make it easier and more effective.

Here are 10 tips for your scholarship search:

  1. Assemble your scholarship search tools—Having the right tools makes all the difference. Your tools for this search will be a professional email, a filing system and a calendar.
  2. Search scholarship databases—Scholarship databases are an invaluable tool in the search. Here are 7 sites to get you started.
  3. Check into other schools’ resources—If you live near a community college or better yet, a university, you can utilize them as additional resources. They have libraries and scholarship listings that might be unique to your area.
  4. Utilize your school’s resources—Counselors are great resources for your scholarship search. Scholarships come across their desks every day and most of them have scholarship application forms available for the asking.
  5. Search your community—Every community has local organizations that offer scholarships to local students.(i.e. non-profit groups, local businesses)
  6. Don’t forget government sources—Believe it or not the U.S. Government also offers scholarships to high school students heading to college. Explore these opportunities.
  7. Pursue all personal and family affiliations—Brainstorm about your family and scholarship opportunities that are specific to you.
  8. Apply effective internet search techniques—Follow the primary trail to secondary trails. Many times there will be less well-known scholarships lurking in the shadows of the primary trail. How does this translate: the less that know about the scholarship, the less applications, the greater your chances of winning.
  9. Uncover school specific awards—Most colleges have scholarships that are only available to their students. Research the colleges you are contemplating attending and find out what types of scholarships are available. You may have to fill out a separate application when you apply to the college.
  10. Search organizations—Go to the library and ask the reference librarian for an Encyclopedia of Organizations. Make note of any scholarship opportunities that are listed that might pertain to you or your family.

Answering the Common App Essay Prompts

 

essayOver the past five years I have read and commented on hundreds of essays from students all over the country. As a result of that work, I have two categories of advice: general essay-writing tips (which we’ll discuss soon), and specific ways to make the Common App essay prompts work for you.

The big idea here is that the story you want to tell matters a lot more than the prompt you attach to it. Most stories are about more than one thing, so yours might be about identity and failure, or about contentment and coming of age. So write the story first, and then figure out how to pitch it to an admissions committee. Having said that, it’s still useful to understand the questions. So let’s look at them in detail:

1. Some students have a background or story that is so central to their identity that they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.

There are several ways to read this question:  Is your ethnic, racial, cultural, or linguistic background central to your identity? Do you have a specific story you can tell that illustrates that in an engaging way? Sweet. Try it and see how it goes.

But that’s not the only thing way to answer this question. It can also be about what it felt like when your family moved from Oklahoma to NYC, and how that move made you who you are today. It could be about the birth of your little sister the summer before your junior year, and how becoming one of her primary caregivers changed your perception of yourself.

2. Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it affect you, and what lessons did you learn?

One way to think about this question is that’s not really about the failure at all, but rather, about the response to failure. It’s an opportunity for you to tell the admissions officers how you respond to adversity. What’s nice about this question is that you don’t have to pretend that your failure was actually a success, or any of that job-interview nonsense. If you face-planted in epic style, write about that, as long as you then write about how you dug all the gravel out of your face and kept going.

You can also add to your understanding of this question by thinking broadly about what it means to fail at something. You could write about failing tenth grade chemistry. But really, it would be a lot more interesting to write about how you came to the realization that no matter how hard you worked, your feet would never allow you dance on pointe. One of my students wrote about how she came to accept that fact, but that in doing so, she also discovered not only how to dance for pleasure again, but to enjoy other activities, too.

3. Reflect on a time when you challenged a belief or idea. What prompted you to act? Would you make the same decision again?

Just like the question about failure, this question should be understood as broadly as possible. Don’t limit it to school. Do your parents believe that financial security is the only consideration in choosing a career, while you want to be an actor? Do your parents want you to follow your dreams, while you want something grounded and practical for yourself? Does your school worship athletic prowess, while you think social action is more important?

Stories about standing up to bullies or publishing an article in the school newspaper that the administration didn’t want you to are great examples, but bravery isn’t always loud and public; sometimes it’s quiet and private.

4. Describe a place or environment where you are perfectly content. What do you do or experience there, and why is it meaningful to you?

What’s your favorite TV show? (Quick – just pick one.) Now, think about what makes that show your favorite. Is everyone in it happy all the time, and good friends all the time, and nothing ever happens because there’s no drama? A lot of my students have said things like, “I feel really content while playing the piano because it lets me lose myself in the music,” or “I feel really content in my grandmother’s kitchen.”

But being content doesn’t really make for a good story. So for this essay, try to think about why you feel content somewhere. One of my students wrote about being content in the dance studio at her school, and the process that led her to feel that way. She hadn’t always felt content there. In fact, for a while she had felt intimidated there. The essay turned out to be about how she grew into herself, both as a dancer and as a leader.

5. Discuss an accomplishment or event, formal or informal, that marked your transition from childhood to adulthood within your culture, community, or family.

Just as the failure question isn’t really about failure, this one isn’t really about the accomplishment or event: it’s about how you fit into your community. So you can write about your bar or bat mitzvah, or your quinceañera, but you could also write about your first job, or the time you had to put your dog down, or what you learned from looking after your younger sibling.

Remember when I said that the story matters more than the prompt? That’s because all the prompts are really the same prompt, asking for the same story: “Tell us how you’ve grown and matured over time.”

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­Today’s guest post is by Rachel Shulman of Shulman & Hill, LLC. Rachel is a passionate teacher, and her students often comment that this passion and excitement for her subject makes them more interested, sometimes in spite of themselves. She has helped students achieve their goals in all three AP History classes and both AP English classes, as well as on the Reading Comprehension and Writing sections of the ACT and SAT. Since the fall of 2010, she has edited over 300 college application essays, working both on her own and with independent educational consultants.

A graduate of Bryn Mawr College, where she majored in History, Rachel also holds an MA in History and an MS in Library and Information Science, both from the University of Illinois – Urbana Champaign.  

Based in the Boston area, but with students all over the country, Shulman & Hill specializes in standardized test preparation, high school English, History, Math, Physics, Biology, and college application essays. We provide individualized learning plans tailored to the student’s unique learning style. Our goal is to leave our clients prepared for independent academic success.

The Empty Nest: Should You Redecorate?

 

redecorateSome parents may mentally throw a party when their child goes off to college, while others may feel their home will be empty without the noise, mess and general frenzy that teenagers bring to a house and wish they were not going to college at all.

To decorate or not to decorate?

Many parents may believe that they need to keep their child’s bedroom the same and always available for when they return, while others may rub their hands together in glee at the thought of having a reclaimed space to play with. It may be best for parents to leave the room untouched for a little while, perhaps a few semesters, to see how often the child returns to the family home, and whether when they do, they need their own room to sleep in.

What to do with what is left behind

The child will not have been able to take all their stuff with them to college, so when it is time to redecorate, it goes without saying that there will be a fair amount of furniture and accessories that will need to be stored or repurposed. With the child’s permission, check through the room’s contents, throwing out anything that is broken, and give to charity anything, such as toys, that they have grown out of.

Different uses for the spare room

A vacated bedroom offers parents the chance to reclaim a bit of their home for themselves. Hobbies that were carried out in awkward places now have the chance to spread out. Wives who want their husbands out from under their feet can suggest that the child’s bedroom becomes a room solely for masculine use, perhaps being turned into a home cinema room complete with blackout drapes and a comfortable recliner chair; a home gym fitted out with wall-length mirrors and equipment, complemented by light, stimulating wall colors; or even a games room, with pinball machines and a football table.

A mother could have that arts and crafts room she always wanted, complete with a worktable and shelves or storage units full of beads, ribbons and other haberdashery. More prosaically, it could become a room where all the laundry is sorted and ironing could be carried out, rather than have it spilling over into the downstairs reception rooms. Of course, the room could serve both parents if it were transformed into a home study with computer desk and chair, a small select library with long and high bookcases, or even a meditation room with low lighting and minimalist decoration.

Remember they come back

It is a good idea that despite whatever type of room the space is turned into, it serves a dual purpose and can become a bedroom once again, however impromptu and impermanent it may be. An excellent way to achieve this is to have a sofa bed in the room, which will not only provide a place to sit during the day, but will turn into a bed on those occasions when the child returns home and needs a place to sleep.

Scholarship Friday: 3 Scholarship Truths

 

scholarship truthsParents usually have two misinformed views about scholarships. First, they think it’s impossible to win scholarships because its like the lottery, a one in a million chance to win. Secondly, they think that only kids with high GPAs win scholarships. Nothing could be further from the truth.

I’m not going to lie. Winning scholarships requires a commitment both on your part and on the student’s part. It’s not going to happen if your student isn’t invested heavily in the process. And it’s not going to happen if you aren’t willing to help. It requires work, perseverance, and determination. If neither of these are present, scholarships will be impossible to win.

Here are 3 scholarship truths that can make all the difference:

You MUST search

Searching for scholarships is not easy. It requires an endless persistence in looking for them, a willingness to explore every available opportunity, and a commitment to invest your time and resources in the effort. Yes, you can sign up on scholarship engines like Zinch, but these engines are not your only options; and if you’re not willing to dig for those lesser known scholarships, (especially locally) you’re only decreasing your chances of winning.

Parents can play a huge part in this part of the process. Pay attention, read everything you can, watch for them on social media, subscribe to podcasts (like How to Pay for College HQ) and subscribe to blogs that talk about scholarships (like this one). High school students are extremely busy and their time and effort is best spent completing the applications. You and your college-bound teen can be a team for this aspect of the process.

You MUST apply

One expert, Gyan Devi, says the time spent applying to scholarships reaps more rewards than a part-time job. However, the students MUST be invested in this part of the process. You can’t write their essays, complete the paperwork, or push them into it. If they aren’t invested, it’s not going to payoff with rewards.

One way to motivate them to do this is to have the money talk early in high school. If your student understands that winning scholarships directly affects his/her ability to attend college, they are going to be more likely to commit their time to applying.

You MUST be unique

According to “The Scholarship Mom“, packaging makes the difference. In order for your student’s scholarship applications to stand out, you need to package it properly. Just applying, especially when your student is one of thousands, probably won’t produce winning results. Just like anything you’re trying to sell or promote, it’s all about the marketing. And your student is marketing himself to the scholarship committee. You need to make sure he puts his best foot forward.

The truth about scholarships? There are scholarships for every student, some with high GPAs and some don’t even ask for a GPA. But, unless your student is willing to commit their time to the process, he/she is not going to win any scholarships. If you and your student work as a team, the odds of winning that big payoff increases dramatically. If you follow these simple tips and suggestions, the time spent will be well worth the payoff.

 

12 Essay Experts on Twitter

 

essay experts
Photo by By Aleksi Tappura

I began my search for essay experts on Twitter a few days ago. To my surprise, and disappointment, most of the accounts I found were for companies or organizations that write essays for students. I find that disturbing as a parent, and as a college coach. It baffles me that students would actually pay someone to write their essay for them which is out and out plagiarism and that’s why there are sites like Unplag that can help. Even more surprising were the number of essay experts who were not on Twitter or inactive.

Along with the multitude of essay writing services, I also found a great number of complaints from dissatisfied customers complaining about the quality of the essay they paid for. And the age old proverb is true: if you want something done right, do it yourself.

These twitter accounts are essay coaches—they help you write your OWN college essay by providing encouragement, guidance and support throughout the essay writing process. Follow them for tips about the essay and connect with them if your student needs help.

Essay specialists

1. College Essay Guy @collegeessayguy

2. The Essay Expert @brendabernstein

3. Essay Hell @essayhell

4. Chris Polley @essaybrainstorm

5. All College Essays @allcollegeessay

College counselors who help students with essays

6. Megan Dorsey @collegeprepllc

7. Jeannie Borin @jeannieborin

8. Paul Hemphill @vcollegeadvisor

9. Jessica Velasco @Admissions411

10. Jim Overton @ccofsc

11. George Scurlock @collegehelp1

12. International College Counselors @College_Experts

 

Wednesday’s Parent: College Visits and the Illogical

 

college visitsI will never forget Nancy Berk’s chapter in her book, College Bound and Gagged, when she talks about college visits. It only seems fitting as we revisit the student role in the college visit that I share Nancy’s story of a fairly common visit since we are revisiting the student’s role in the college visit today. She calls it “The Tour de Chance” and it goes like this:

Yes, there’s a chance you could land on campus and your teen will refuse to get out of the car. It’s pretty common, totally baffling, and goes something like this . . .

Son: I’ve seen enough; let’s go.

Parent: But we haven’t even parked the car yet.

Son: You don’t think I can tell already? I DON’T like it here.

Parent: But we’re finally here. Let’s get out and look around.

Once the visit is completed, the verdict is in and it’s far from logical. The campus can be breathtaking and the tour guide engaging, but don’t assume your teen’s impression will reflect that. Rejection rationale is not logical or consistent across high school juniors and seniors. Rejection reasons are often bipolar. They include:

  • Too many beautiful students–it’s not normal
  • Too many badly dressed students–it’s not normal
  • Gloomy weather–totally depressing
  • Too much sunshine–totally depressing

During tour experiences, parents wait for logical academic rejection reasons. Instead they are bombarded with reasons related to fashion, temperature, food and architecture. One friend was perplexed by the value her daughter placed on dormitory bathroom configurations.

Still seemingly ridiculous rejection reasons are easier to understand than the vague one most parents hear–“I just don’t like the look”. Teens can’t explain it, but they are 100% certain from “the look” that this college experience will be the worst one.

For more student college visit quirks check out my previous blog: The Student Role in the College Visit

And then read Wendy’s post: Must-know tricks and tips for successful college visits 

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Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety. Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

The bonus is on the fourth Wednesday of each month when Wendy and I will host Twitter chat #CampusChat at 9pm ET/6pm PT. We will feature an expert on a topic of interest for parents of the college-bound.

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from parentingforcollege to pocsmom.com and vice versa.

Wednesday’s Parent: Oh the conversations you should have (before prom)

 

promA play on words from Dr. Seuss’ “Oh the Places You’ll Go”; oh the conversations you should have before prom. Apart from the tears, the photos, the worrying and the knowledge that your little baby is all grown up, prom should be an opportunity for you to offer some straight talk about the BIG 3: Sex, Drugs and Drinking. Why? Because at every prom there are students who cross the line and participate in some risky behavior they think demonstrates adulthood.

Sex

Is dating gone? What about courtship? According to a recent NY Times article and most high school and college students it’s a dinosaur. They have random “hook ups” with people they meet–which can include anything from making out to oral sex to intercourse. Parents need to know and understand this new culture in order to prepare their students for college. As I’ve said before, preparation is much more than academics.

Read my post:  The Hooking Up Culture

Drugs

If you or your child has been in the public school system in the last 30 years you’re familiar with the phrase–just say no. From first grade on, those words have been pounded into the heads of kids giving them an answer to anyone who offers them drugs or any other form of abuse. It’s not the answer sometimes that’s important, as much as the attitude behind the response.

Research shows that kids who have a good relationship with their parents are less likely to pursue a life of abuse. The drug awareness programs give parents some guidelines they say will help. They instruct parents to do several things and lead us to believe that if we follow those rules, our kids are less likely to succumb to peer pressure.

Their suggestions have merit. But the bottom line is that most kids, no matter how strong they appear or how great their relationship is with their parents, are going to find themselves in a situation where just saying “no” is not enough. Just saying “no” will be met with teasing, pressure, and even ridicule. It’s your job as a parent to prepare them for that moment.

Read my post: When Just Say “NO” is not enough

Drinking

Your teens are graduating from high school and heading to college. There are 17 million college students that drink alcohol, and 8.5 million of them are binge drinking. We’ve heard the terms “poor” or “struggling” college student before, but it’s no wonder they are living off of Ramen Noodles when there was a reported $163 billion spent on alcohol in America in 2011. It’s not all fun and games when young people are consuming 2 gallons per person of alcohol. There are negative consequences of this behavior that includes assault, rape, injury and even death.

Take a look at these two info graphics that will underscore the importance of this conversation:

How Much Do College Students Drink

The Truth About College Binge Drinking

These are brutal conversations to have with your teen but it may be the last time you can exert some parental influence before they leave for college in the fall. A good friend of mine, Paul Hemphill, a college admissions counselor, says, “every school is a party school.” A difficult fact to face but a reality. Have the conversations now—and if you’re lucky some of it will sink in.

For more prom tips, read Wendy’s post: Surviving Your Teen’s Prom

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Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety.                                                                                                                                                                           Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

The bonus is on the fourth Wednesday of each month when Wendy and I will host Twitter chat #CampusChat at 9pm ET/6pm PT. We will feature an expert on a topic of interest for parents of the college-bound.

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from parentingforcollege to pocsmom.com and vice versa.

SAT Prep to your Smartphone

 

prepcube

 

Say what? Yep. SAT prep to your smartphone via text message. What could possibly be easier. And here’s even better news–it’s affordable. Just $9 a month for the bronze plan and $19 a month for the silver plan. Why not reach kids where they are–on their smartphones?

What is Prepcube.com?

Prepcube.com is a learning management system that allows students to study for the SAT via SMS and our proprietary instant messenger platform. Prepcube has the ability to administer questions and video based solutions for real time feedback via sms and instant messenger. Our system allows students, parents and teachers to track all of their student’s results through our dashboard.  Our data shows that students will engage our platform because they are more engaged when they interact with content via sms or instant messenger, which are their preferred mediums of communication.

How does it work?

As the system currently stands, students are pushed one question and solution via text message and have the option for mobile and web based private tutoring. After the initial question they are given the option to study unlimited amounts of questions via a web based instant messenger system. While on this web-based system they are also given the option for mobile and web based private tutoring.

Who is running the show?

All content was developed by the Co-Founder of Bell Curves, a leading standardized test preparation company. He oversees all aspects of the development of programs and materials, as well as the training of tutors. He has spent the last 18 years working as a standardized test prep trainer and materials developer at three different test prep companies.

Score! A developer who knows how to reach teens, has a background in SAT tutoring, and knows how to use the medium to help them learn.

Mom-Approved Tips: Is Cheating Wrong?

 

cheatingThe answer to that question is easy: YES! But do our teens believe that and why are so many of them cheating, especially on standardized tests?

I watched a news program last night chronicling a cheating scandal. Last week I heard a story about someone who figured out an anomaly in standardized tests to get a perfect score. In each of these instances, their cheating was never discovered and they went on to go to college.

These stories made me wonder—why are our teens cheating? Is it pressure to achieve standards that are unattainable? Is the peer pressure over college so overwhelming that they will do anything to excel over their fellow students? Or is it just easy to do because there are no consequences?

A recent poll

According to a recent ABC News poll of 12-17 year olds, cheating among teens is “widespread if not endemic. And it usually works.” Here are the results from the poll:

  • 7 in 10 say at least some kids in their school cheat on tests
  • 6 in 10 have friends who have cheated
  • 1 in 3 says they themselves have cheated
  • 1 in 8 say “most” kids in their school cheat on tests
  • Among 12-14 year olds, 23 percent admit to cheating
  • Among 15 year olds, 36 percent admit to cheating
  • Among 16-17 year olds, 43 percent admit to cheating
  • 8 percent believe that in order to get ahead in life you have to cheat from time to time
  • 90 percent say cheaters will lose out in the long run
  • 96 percent say their parents would rather have them do their own best work, regardless of the grade, than get good grades if it means cheating.
  • Most say cheaters don’t get caught
  • Nearly all teens in the survey said cheating was wrong

The survey also found that teens who hang out with cheaters are more likely to be tempted to cheat and cheat themselves.

The parent factor

Interestingly, communication on the issue is in short supply: just 1/3 of kids say they and their parents have had a serious discussion about cheating. Kids who have spoken about it with parents are no less likely to have cheated than those who haven’t. Still those who are the most likely to say they’ve cheated (16-17 year olds) are the least likely to say they have talked about the issue with their parents. Just 27 percent say they have done so, compared with 41 percent of 12-13 year olds.

Deterrents

Rather than a serious talk from parents, teens say that better teacher involvement and greater risk of getting caught could serve as deterrents. One third of the teens say they would be more likely to cheat if they knew they would never get caught, suggesting better enforcement could help curb the practice.

In a seemingly related result, almost as many teens, nearly three in 10, say they’d be more likely to cheat if they had a teacher who didn’t seem to care about their work. Teachers who develop student loyalty — as well as those who guard against cheating — also may be better-equipped to prevent it.

Grade pressure seems less a consideration. Fewer, 14 percent, say they’d be more apt to cheat if they thought other students were cheating and by being honest they’d get a lower grade. About as many, 16 percent, say they’d be more apt to cheat in a class they thought didn’t matter as far as their future.

No consequences

It’s clear from the survey that consequences play a huge role in the decision to cheat. As long as you don’t get caught, it’s ok to do it. The real problem is that cheating teens usually grow up to become cheating adults—they got away with it in school; they can get away with it as adults.

At the very least, parents should be talking to their teens about cheating. Here’s a good list of 10 reasons why cheating is wrong. I especially like #8 and #10.