Tag Archives: admissions

admissions, parenting, Wednesdays parent

Wednesday’s Parent: Rivalries among college-bound teens

January 15, 2014 Suzanne Shaffer 1 Comment

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Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety. Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from pocsmom.com to parentingforcollege and vice versa.

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It’s that time of year again—college offers of admission will be arriving and students will be responding to those offers. Years ago, on the popular show Dawson’s Creek, the teenage characters were going through the college prep process. As the process unfolded the viewers shared in every part of the process, from application, to waiting, to acceptance and rejection. Obviously the writers of the show had experienced this before because they were dead-on about the types of emotions teenagers go through during this period in their lives.

One specific storyline involved a girl who was striving for an Ivy League acceptance and a boy whose grades were not quite as stellar and had set his sights low when it came to college. It created quite a conflict—one student excited about their college prospects and the other stressed about getting an acceptance at all. It’s a fine line between showing excitement and bragging so much that it’s offensive to others.

This is a time to teach some life lessons that your teen can take with them to college and into their life as an adult.

Tolerance

Kids will be kids. And unfortunately they often mimic their parents (in a negative way). Bragging will occur—you can count on it. The rivalry will intensify when the offers of admission arrive. When this happens, this is a great opportunity for you to teach your teen about tolerance. Although they may not like listening to other kids brag, it’s a fact of life. People will brag and boast and they are bound to run into this as adults. Learning to deal with it now should make it easier in the future.

Gratitude

As the offers of admission arrive it’s a great opportunity for them to learn about gratitude. Being grateful for their success should make it easier for them to avoid making others feel inferior.

Acceptance

Part of the process is learning to accept the outcome and adjust expectations, especially if the outcome is not what they expected. Often acceptance is not easily achieved but it is part of facing reality and becoming an adult.

Graciousness

When their friends receive offers of admission and they don’t, or they get waitlisted, it’s going to be difficult. In life others will be promoted before them, own bigger houses and more expensive cars. Instead of feeling jealous or envious, it will be much easier to be gracious and celebrate their accomplishments.

The rivalry that occurs among college-bound teens is hard to deal with as a parent. We don’t like to see our kids hurt or their self-esteem destroyed by other kids; but you can use the opportunity to build character.

Read Wendy’s blog post: College admissions rivalry

admissions, college costs, college guidance, college planning, college transfer, mom approved tips

Mom-Approved Tips: Questions parents ask about college

December 16, 2013 Suzanne Shaffer

Over the years, parents have cornered me and asked me questions about the college admissions process and their college-bound teens. While those questions are varied, and sometimes specific as they relate to their own circumstances, parents undoubtedly have questions about the college prep process and beyond. Following are some of the most common questions parents ask about college.

About choosing a college

How many colleges do you think my teen should apply to?

Here’s a good formula: 3 reach colleges (colleges that might be a reach but still attainable), 4 good fit colleges (colleges that are a good match for the student), 3 safety colleges (colleges that the student will be at the top of the applicant pool). Having choices also means the colleges are in competition, which translates into negotiation for you with the financial aid package.

What’s the most important tip you could give me about the college admissions process?

Find those “perfect fit” colleges. Do the research and evaluate choices based on student body, academic programs, college visits, location and financial aid awards. If the college is a good fit, they will value the student for his/her contribution to the student body. Those are the colleges you want in your application pool.

About financial aid

Should I fill out the FAFSA even though I think we make too much money to qualify for financial aid?

YES. YES. YES. The FAFSA is what colleges use to determine your EFC (Expected Family Contribution) which is used to determine the financial aid package. This package is NOT just federal aid. It’s composed of grants, scholarships and loans (much of which is merit-aid directly from the colleges themselves). If you don’t fill it out, your teen can’t get ANY of that money.

We can’t afford to pay for college, does that mean our teen won’t be able to go?

There are all kinds of ways to finance a college education: student loans, work-study, college grants and scholarships. Everyone qualifies for parent and student loans. But be wise about your borrowing and consider the best options. Paul Hemphill with Pre College Prep has come up with a GREAT way to attend college on the cheap!

About SAT scores

My teen’s SAT scores aren’t that great; will it affect their admissions chances?

The bottom line is that most colleges do look at those SAT scores. But, it’s just part of the overall picture. The best advice I can give is MAKE CONTACT with an admissions representative from EVERY college your teen is applying to. This PERSONAL contact can and will make a difference when the admissions application is reviewed. Do this by visiting and making an appointment to speak with them. Then hang on to their card and stay in contact until acceptance letters arrive.

About organization

My teen is so scatter-brained and we keep missing deadlines–how can I help them get organized?

Set up a landing zone for college material. Use a desk, a file cabinet, a bulletin board, and a wall calendar to keep track of deadlines. Start this freshman year and remind them that their floor is NOT the landing zone. Once they get used to bringing everything to that one spot, it will be easier to find, file and locate all the college related materials.

About dealing with rejection

What do you do when your student is rejected? How do you handle your feelings? How do you handle your student’s feelings?

When it arrives you may want to try and spin it into a positive. Resist that temptation. It’s upsetting to both you and your student. Allow some time to display the emotions related to the disappointment and the feelings of rejection. It’s only natural to feel them and it certainly hasn’t been the first or the last time your student will be disappointed. Parents take these letters personally. How dare they reject MY child! Our disappointment can often overshadow the feelings our student has. Be careful and don’t project your disappointment on to your student. He/she feels bad enough already; the last thing they need to feel is that they disappointed their parents by not getting accepted.

Every student reacts differently. Some might shrug it off (to your surprise) and others might see this as the end of their world as they know it. The hardest part of this whole college process is dealing with disappointment and rejection. All the truisms in the world won’t help at this moment. Hold them, hug them, and let them know that you feel their pain. Don’t spout off truisms like “it will be ok” or “you don’t want to go there if they don’t want you.” Your student needs the time to deal with their disappointment and move on.

Once the time has passed and your student is able to be objective, use this as a life lesson. Remind them that there is a place for them and that there is a college where they will feel wanted and accepted. Point out that life is filled with disappointments that often turn into opportunities and you never know what lies ahead on the path you might not have originally chosen.

Every child faces disappointment and rejection throughout their life and a parent’s goal should be to help them face those hurtful times with love and perspective.

About college discontent

What do I do when my student wants to drop out of college or talks about transferring during the first semester?

Before you say anything listen to their reasons. Don’t scream and yell, listen. Your student is upset and needs to voice how they feel. It may not be logical or even feasible, but they need to vent and you need to listen. Stay calm and approach this by treating them as an adult. Use reasoning first and see if that helps. Most freshmen get immediately homesick, especially if they don’t get along with their new roommate or their coursework is overwhelming them. Usually by the end of the first semester they have settled in and have made some friends. Usually.

There may be very good financial reasons for them to stick it out and then re-evaluate at the end of the first year. It’s rare that your student will use finances as an excuse to transfer, but if they do, be prepared to answer with a logical explanation.

Is there a friend or a boyfriend encouraging them to move back home or join them where they are? This is the worst reason. Help them to understand that they made the choice to leave and it’s time for them to move on with their life. Holding on to the past will only cause them to miss the benefits of the future. They may be adults but you, almost always, hold the purse strings.

In most cases, you should stand your ground—at least until the end of the first year. Tell your student that if he/she still feels the same way at the end of the year you can revisit the option. It’s my experience that most students, later in life, thank their parents for giving them some tough love when they needed it.

I’m not saying it’s easy to listen to their pain and not act. And in some instances their mental health is much more important than drawing a line in the sand. But you know your child and you will know when they are just too unhappy and miserable to remain where they are. In some cases, they just chose the wrong school.

giveaways

Saturday Giveaway: In: College Admissions and Beyond

November 16, 2013 Suzanne Shaffer

Two expert college admissions consultants—a mother-daughter team—share their step-by-step, proven strategy for creating an application that stands out and gets you IN!

Lillian Luterman and Jennifer Bloom have been helping high school students get into choice schools for more than twenty years. For each student, their method is based on a simple concept: “be alike but spike.” Ironically, it’s often the “well-rounded student,” an ideal many applicants strive for, who gets rejected. In! College Admissions and Beyond shows students how to create an individual distinction by identifying a passion and “layering” it—showcasing their interest in many different ways. While guiding students through every step in the application process, this book is enlivened with instructive case studies, charts and checklists, sidebars for parents, and New Yorker cartoons.

And unlike most books about “getting in,” In!’s lessons do not end at college acceptance. Luterman and Bloom present the admissions process as an opportunity for students to mature, expand their horizons, and discover what makes them tick. This book gets students in, and gives them the tools and confidence they will need for future success.

Enter my giveaway for your chance to win a copy of this helpful book on college admissions.

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admissions, how to, Uncategorized

How to Understand EA and ED

October 10, 2013 Suzanne Shaffer

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EA (Early Action) and ED (Early Decision) have confused parents for years. Applying to college has become more competitive and more complicated. Years ago (long before my time), all you did was apply and everyone applied at the same time. But times have changed and so have college applications. If you break the terms down it’s easier to understand. I’ve turned to some experts to help you decipher the differences and understand the benefits and/or the downsides of applying EA or ED.

What is EA and ED?

The first comes from Patrick O’Connor, Associate Dean of College Counseling, Cranbrook-Kingswood School, and author of College is Yours 2.0:

Early Action: Also known as EA, colleges that offer this option promise a quick response if you submit a completed application by their early deadline. Students admitted EA don’t have to promise to attend the college; they just want to hear back sooner than usual. Students can apply as EA candidates to several colleges at the same time, as long as they are submitting a quality application that didn’t get thrown together at the last minute.

Restricted Early Action: Sometimes known as Early Action Single Choice, REA works much like Early Action, but the student is limited in the number of other colleges where they can submit early applications — and that number is often zero. Colleges do this for a number of reasons, but they most often want the student to show a special commitment to their college without having to promise to go there. This can reduce the number of students who apply early who aren’t really thinking about why the college is right for them , and still reward the students who feel a special bond to the school.

Early Decision: ED applications require a little more from students than EA applications. The process is the same — students submit a completed application by an early deadline — but if a student is admitted as an ED student, they promise to withdraw all other college applications at attend the college that admitted them ED. If this sounds like serious business, it is. Students should only apply ED to a college they absolutely, positively love, and cannot live without.

Read Patrick’s entire article on Huffington Post about how to determine if either of these is best for your student.

Tips for Potential ED/EA Applicants

Peter Van Buskirk, an acclaimed author and motivational speaker, excels at simplifying and demystifying what is often perceived as a complex and mysterious process—college admission. His creative programming, including his signature presentation of “The Admission Game®,” has informs parents and students about the ins and outs of the college admissions process.

Peter gives several tips for college applicants seeking EA/ED:

Read the fine print for each institutional offering and understand your commitments before initiating an early application of any sort.
Rather than looking for an “ED school,” focus on finding colleges that fit you well as you arrive at your short list of schools. If one of them becomes your absolute first choice, then ED should be a considered option.
Do not apply ED unless you are dead certain of your commitment to enroll if accepted.
Do not apply ED if you have not visited the campus first! Ideally, your visit will have included an overnight stay that enabled you to also attend classes and experience the campus culture.
Resist the temptation to act on impulse. The feelings you have for a college now might change greatly over time leaving you committed to a place that is no longer where you want to be. Give yourself at least a month to reflect on your intended application before applying ED.
Remember the ED Round II option. Many schools will give you the opportunity to “convert” your Regular Decision application during a second round of ED in January. The conditions are the same as with ED Round I, but you might be better prepared to make a commitment later in the year.
Resolve all $$ questions and concerns before applying ED. Once you are admitted, there can be no contingencies. Ask the school’s financial aid office to provide an “early estimate” of your expected family contribution (EFC) before you submit your ED application. Apply ED only if you are completely satisfied with the information you receive regarding your EFC.
Sprint to the finish! Even though you might hold an EA or ED acceptance letter, it is likely to be conditional on your completion of the senior at the same level of achievement that earned you the offer of admission. More than a few colleges are known to rescind offers of admission when final transcripts show performances that drop measurably after offers of admission are secured.

Read Peter’s entire article, Making Sense of ED/EA Options. for a look at the numbers, options and who benefits.

What is “rolling admissions”?

Schools with rolling admissions offer important options and opportunities that static deadlines don’t. Rolling admissions schools will accept and examine applications as they are sent in, instead of waiting to judge all applications concurrently. Schools with rolling admissions can be great for late admissions, or for finding out early on whether or not you are accepted, so you can change your plan accordingly.

Peterson’s provides an article about the Advantages and Disadvantages of Rolling Admissions.

What is regular admissions?

A discussion of EA and ED needs to include a discussion on regular admissions as well. Regular admissions require that the student submit their application before the application deadline (which is later than EA and ED). The advantage of this being that students have more time to prepare and have no restrictions on the number of schools they can apply to.

This pool of applicants is much larger and the competition for these slots will be more competitive. Colleges typically have lower admission rates for regular admission applicants.

College 101 provides a comparison table, which includes EA, ED, Rolling Admissions, and Regular Decision, to help decide which application deadline is right for you.

admissions, college guidance, college planning, Guest Posts

An interview with the Dean of Admissions and Financial Aid at UNC-Ashville

September 17, 2012 Suzanne Shaffer

A special thanks to Dr. Patrice Mitchell for participating in The Parliament Tutors Admission Spotlight Series. Dr. Mitchell is the Dean of Admissions & Financial Aid at UNC – Asheville.

As the Dean of Admissions, what are your day-to-day responsibilities?
I can definitely say that no two days are ever the same, which is also what I love about working with students to help them navigate through what can often be a nerve-wracking experience. Depending on the time of the year, I spend a lot of time reviewing enrollment reports to ensure that admissions decisions are being made on a daily basis to ensure we will enroll the desired quality and quantity of new students. I also spend a lot of time responding to questions from prospective students and their families about the application process and requirements.

What do you consider the most significant parts of an application, the parts which applicants should prepare the most carefully?
In regards to UNC Asheville, the most significant component of the application is the high school record. Specifically, rigor of course work, grade point average, and class rank.

Is there anything you frequently see on an application that you hope to never see again?
There is nothing that jumps out at me. However, the one thing that I would caution students on is the tendency to reveal such personal and sometimes tragic information, but do not necessarily correlate those experiences to how they have prepared them to be successful at the institution.

What common pitfalls should applicants be careful to avoid?
I can not emphasis enough the importance of proofreading all of your supporting documentation that you submit as a part of the application – including having the correct name of the institution on the essay. (Yes, I have had read “It has been my dream to attend X college all of my life” when the college that I am reading the application for is actually college Y!
Students should also avoid missing deadlines or assuming they have plenty of time to submit information prior to the deadline. Time for technology glitches and mail delivery problems should always be accounted for when submitting application materials. Students should also follow up with their counselors and/or individuals submitting recommendations to give them friendly reminders regarding the deadlines.

Are there any myths about the application process which you would like to dispel?
One thing that I would share about the process is that Admissions Offices really do want to make an admissions decision based upon whether or not the individual student will be a good fit and for the institution. Therefore, it is important for you to take the time to write a good essay that gives some insight into who you really are that SAT and gpa averages won’t tell us. It is also important to have an individual that truly knows them and the institution the student is applying. These are the reasons that you sometimes here of a student with a stronger SAT and gpa not getting into a specific college when there classmate does.

What advice would you give to an applicant with below-average test scores but significant extra-curricular experience?
Please remember that there are literally thousands of college options available to you. You just have to be open to exploring a handful that you may not have initially had on the top of your list. The reality is that at some schools the admissions process is selective and not having all of the components may keep you from getting an offer. However, at those schools where the SAT is optional or the SAT being below average many not be as big of a problem, that may be the school where you end up deciding to attend and find yourself having a wonderful experience. However, you may still want to contact the prospective college and ask to speak to the admissions counselor responsible for your high school. Establishing a relationship with that individual can sometimes be helpful.

Do you frequently have to turn away applicants whom you wish you could admit? If so, what could those applicants do to be admitted?
Unfortunately, we are not in a positive to offer admission to every applicant. In that case, the transfer option is discussed. This option is also being used by students who are admissible but want to get started at a two-year college and transfer in. There are several universities with articulation agreements with two-year colleges. Therefore, the idea of transferring in as an upper-classmen has become more of a positive alternative for students who are not competitive for freshmen admission. The important thing to remember is that sometimes there are different paths to get to the same destination.

How much faith do you have in the ability of the SAT to predict success at in college?
Here at UNC Asheville we take a holistic approach to the admissions process in order to reduce the importance that one variable has on the application decision. This is particular important to us since the high school rank and grade point average has been shown to be more of a predictor of success here than the SAT. Having said that, we do have a selective process in place, and we are a part of the UNC system, which requires us to report the average SAT, so it is a factor.

What do you look for in a recommendation letter?
Students should ensure that the recommendation letter is from someone who knows them well enough to speak to the attributes and strengths that make the student a good fit with the college. It also helps if the letter is written to the specific college. Not everyone is going to be able provide such detailed information, or even has the time to do so if they wanted to, but I enjoy reading letters from teachers and/or counselors who have some type of story or anecdote to share about the student that I otherwise would not know about them.

Joseph Fernandez conducted this interview. Joseph is a Tutor with Parliament Tutors. He specializes in SAT Tutoring.

admissions, college guidance, college planning, Guest Posts

Inside the mind of an admissions officer

May 2, 2012 Suzanne Shaffer

When your student is applying to college, we tend to want to be mind readers and wonder what are those admissions officers using to weigh your student’s college application. Parliament Tutors has been interviewing admissions officers at various colleges across the country and is happy to share one of these interviews with my readers.

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A special thanks to Robert Barkley for participating our Admissions Spotlight Series. Mr. Barkley is the director of undergraduate admissions at Clemson University. Joseph Fernandez from ParliamentTutors conducted this interview.

What do you consider the most significant parts of an application, the parts which applicants should prepare the most carefully?

The most important part of a student’s application file is the high school record/transcript. The preparation there begins at the beginning of the high school career. As to the application form itself, it is important that all information be as accurate and complete as possible. Especially in these days of online applications, the student is doing the initial data entry efforts for what could be their collegiate academic record. Something as simple as one single digit in a zip code can affect the receipt of an admissions decision.

What advice can you offer students in regards to their personal statements? Perhaps you can offer some shining examples that you have seen in the past.

I read a lot of appeal statements from students who’ve been denied admission. Many of them focus on grades and the circumstances that affected the grades. Rarely do they focus on what they learned (despite the grades), which is what you’re really trying to determine when evaluating an application.

Is there anything you frequently see on an application that you hope to never see again?

On the section for international students…where we ask for visa information…I hope I never see a student provide us with credit card numbers and other personal information.

What common pitfalls should applicants be careful to avoid?

Applicants need to remember that the application is the beginning of a dialogue with the college/university. The information provided is going to be read by adults. Students need to be careful not to be over-casual in their approach, presenting information as might be shared with their friends.

Are there any myths about the application process which you would like to dispel?

College Admissions is NOT “The Great SAT Contest”, nor is it “Rush Week” where we sit around and select our friends and people that we like.

What advice would you give to an applicant with below-average test scores but significant extracurricular experience?

Let’s hope that the information on the transcript shows exceptional performance in the classroom. Otherwise, the test scores would appear to verify the grades, and show an over-emphasis on out-of-class activities.

Do you frequently have to turn away applicants whom you wish you could admit? If so, what could those applicants do to be admitted?

They need to realize that many students graduate annually as transfer students. If they are set on GRADUATING from a specific college or university, they need to explore transfer options that can put them on track towards a degree.

How much faith do you have in the ability of the SAT to predict success at in college?

The SAT and ACT are excellent tools for helping to predict college success, but should not be used as the sole indicator. Other factors (most importantly the high school transcript, grades, GPA, strength of curriculum, etc) must be figured into the decision as well.

What do you look for in a recommendation letter?

Honesty and a true sense of perspective.

Joseph Fernandez is an SAT Tutor with Parliament Tutors, a New York tutoring and test preparation service.

admissions, parenting, social networks

Colleges and Social Media

October 13, 2011 Suzanne Shaffer 2 Comments

I just read a great post by a parent who is going through the college admissions process talking about College Admissions Secrets. Take a few minutes to read it because it addresses an important issue with parents: What can I do to assure my student will get accepted to college? Is there a secret?

One admissions officer was asked this question and responded using social media (Twitter). Do you think this was from one of those “helicopter” parents?

I would bet that some admissions representatives regret the day that parents found them on Twitter and Facebook. Now they can ask the questions they have been dying to ask, even at the dismay of some of the college representatives.

For colleges and students, social media can be a two-edged sword in many respects. It gives colleges the opportunity to connect with a larger applicant pool and share their message to a vast number of prospective students. But it also allows the parents of those applicants to interact and insert their questions into the process. Social media allows students to connect directly one-on-one with college representatives and current students. But it also means that students need to be more vigilant about their online persona because the colleges are watching.

If you would like to see how two colleges are using social media to reach students, follow the links below:

Hofstra University

Cornell College

If your student is applying to one of these colleges or any other colleges with a social media presence, let them make the connections themselves. Don’t be one of those parents who make admissions officers run for cover. Encourage your student to search for each college’s social media page and pursue those connections on their own. Let them, as one admissions representative once told me, “drive the car”.

admissions

Is college really attainable for everyone?

June 22, 2011 Suzanne Shaffer 1 Comment

If you work hard in school, study and do your best you should be able to get into a good college. At least that’s what I told my kids who were from a middle class background. But what about the disadvantaged and those who don’t have parents in their corner cheering them on.

Here’s a quote from an article called, Where Poor People Don’t Go to College, and Why posted a few months ago in the Washington Monthly:

Asking why low income people don’t make it to America’s most exclusive colleges is sort of like asking why low income people don’t buy more BMWs. It’s because the price of the good largely prohibits the economically disadvantaged from purchasing that good.

It’s a sad fact that the elite tend to fare well and the disadvantaged aren’t afforded the same opportunities.Here’s an infographic that says it all:

Uncategorized

5 lessons the college-bound can learn from the news about Osama Bin Laden

May 2, 2011 Suzanne Shaffer

You had to have your head buried in the sand the last 12 hours if you didn’t hear the news about Osama Bin Laden. Even though it’s been over 10 years, the news of his demise brings nothing but extreme pride to our country. I began thinking this morning about all that it took to make this come to fruition and the lessons we can all learn from this drama that has unfolded the last 10 years; especially as it applies to the college-bound teen.

There are consequences to all of your actions

Every action in our lives has a consequence–good or bad. If you sow anger, evil, negativity and violence, you reap the same. If you sow honor and dignity while treating others with respect, you will be rewarded. It’s as simple, and complicated, as that. Bin Laden sowed hatred for America and its people. Today we know that Bin Laden has suffered the consequences of his actions.

Never give up

In spite all the rumors of his death, America never stopped looking for either the man, or the proof of his death. Ten years are a long time to keep up the fight. What can you learn from this? All throughout your educational career, you will have ups and downs. Your grades may falter. You may feel like there are so many others more talented than you. You may feel overwhelmed and outgunned. But never give up.

Be proud of who you are

On September 11, 2001, every person in this country came together and was proud to be an American. The same is true today. One of our enemies has been defeated and our country has struck a blow for freedom. Be proud of who you are, embrace your goals, and proceed with fortitude and conviction.

Don’t forget the sacrifice of others

Many American lives were lost in the pursuit of this outcome. Many families paid the ultimate sacrifice in this fight against terrorists. This is a victory for them today as well. Your parents and families will sacrifice much for you during your pursuit of higher education. Don’t forget their sacrifice and always be grateful that they put great value in your education.

Perseverance always pays off

The American military never gave up. They believed their purpose was worthy of their sacrifice. They persevered amidst all the negative attacks from our enemies and achieved a positive outcome. If you persevere through the college admissions process, do your best, and work toward your goals, success will be your ultimate victory.

Today is a day to reflect and remember, but it’s also a day to rejoice that justice has been served and one of our greatest enemies can no longer attack our freedom. Take this time to use the lessons outlined, apply them to your life, and remember that success comes when you move toward your goals.

Parenting for College

Tag Archives: admissions