Tag Archives: ivies

admissions, college guidance, college planning, college prep

Looking Past the College Names and the Rankings

 

rankings

When I talk to parents and listen to their stories about college prep, it’s hard not to be concerned. I’m concerned because it seems that college choice has become a competition–a competition among parents and a competition among students. It’s all about the prestige, the name, and the rankings and very little about the fit.

I recently participated in a discussion thread on the Grown and Flown Facebook page. A mother was concerned that her daughter was only considering applying to the Ivies. I tried to insert my advice on the matter and was attacked by so many parents whose students were either applying to these colleges or attending them. I was simply trying to point out that these colleges aren’t the “be all and end all” of colleges and there are so many other options out there to consider. Shame on me for disparaging these top-ranked universities.

Seriously though, it surprises me how many parents feel that their student can’t be happy at an unknown college or university. It astounds me how many parents will allow their student to attend one of these colleges and either go into debt themselves or allow their student to accumulate mounds of debt; because, news flash—these colleges only provide need-based aid to the poorest of families and merit aid to the best of the applicant pool. Your student may be accepted but offered no financial assistance.

How do you steer your student away from the these colleges?

If your student is a top candidate for an Ivy league college and you are willing to pay for it, then by all means, she should apply. But if you’re worried about finances or know that your student is applying for all the wrong reasons, it’s time to steer them away from these colleges.

The best way to do this is to draw the focus away from the Ivies and toward other colleges that offer the same benefits at a greater return for your investment. Encourage your student to visit colleges, talk to alumni, connect online with students from other colleges and start a conversation.

How do you find those “diamonds in the rough” colleges?

You can start by looking at the College That Change Lives website. Then move toward College Navigator and fill in some criteria that fits your student’s interests: location, size, major, merit awards, etc.. Look at the stats, financial aid awards, and student debt. After you have a list, do some digging. What is your student interested in studying? Is there a student body better suited for her? If she is at the top of the applicant pool will she have a better chance of winning merit aid?

How do you change your (and your student’s) mindset?

Visit. Interact. Start a dialogue with other colleges. Once your student sees the virtual cornucopia of colleges out there, it will be easier for you to move her toward the colleges that are a better fit. Once she realizes that it’s not about the name, but about the fit, it will be easier to add those colleges that fit instead of choosing one simply based on name or ranking.

With over 4000 colleges and universities in this country, it will serve you and your student better if you look at some of the lesser known colleges and examine their benefits. As my daughter did, she found her perfect match when she moved beyond the college with the ranking to the college that was a better fit for her academically, socially, and financially.

mom approved tips, Uncategorized

Mom-Approved Tips: Are the Ivies “All That”?

 

iviesPardon the improper grammar and slang; but seriously–are the Ivies all that? This past week the news media was enamored with the praise of a young man that was accepted to all eight Ivy League colleges. Don’t get me wrong–the young man is to be commended for his efforts. But as usual, the focus was on the fact that it was the Ivies, not the fact that he was offered admission to eight colleges.

Why are the Ivies the “be all and end all” of college acceptance?

From the time my son was little, he said he wanted to go to Harvard. I have no idea why, but he said it so much we bought him a Harvard sweatshirt. If he had applied himself in high school, he would have applied. Instead, he went into the Marines. Did I feel like he had failed, or I had failed, absolutely not. The Ivies would never have been for him.

A recent study showed that only 0.4 percent of undergraduates attend an Ivy League school. However, you can go to any parent meeting about college and the discussion inevitably heads toward the Ivies. “My son is applying to Harvard”, my daughter is applying to “Brown”. And the parents whose students aren’t candidates for these schools immediately start feeling like they have failed their kids–along with a tinge of jealousy.

What should the conversation be about?

Instead of focusing on WHERE the student gets into college, the conversation should be about whether or not a/did they apply and receive an offer of admission (from ANY college) and b/are the colleges they applied to a good fit for their academic, financial and social needs. There are thousands of good colleges across the country, even some that might not be well-known, that offer students and excellent education at an affordable price.

What are we communicating to our kids?

All this hype around the Ivies gives our kids the impression that if you don’t attend an Ivy League college, your life and your future are doomed. You’re destined to work at a mediocre job with a mediocre salary. In addition, we are also communicating that all the kids that get into Harvard or Yale are the best of the best: the smartest, the elite, the successful. When the media puts such focus on college names and the importance of the name, our kids begin to feel pressure to attend these schools.

How can we change the conversation and the overall view of college and success?

It’s not about where you go, or the college name. It’s about what you do with the education your receive and how you leverage the education to move you toward success. A state college student is just as likely to become a CEO, and a Harvard graduate. If the education you receive lands you in a career you love, it matters very little where you got that education. Our kids need to know this and embrace the fact that exclusiveness is never a measure of success.

In a recent article in the New York Times by Frank Gruni, “Our Crazy College Crossroads“, makes an excellent point:

Corner offices in this country teem with C.E.O.s who didn’t do their undergraduate work in the Ivy League. Marillyn Hewson of Lockheed Martin went to the University of Alabama. John Mackey of Whole Foods studied at the University of Texas, never finishing.

Your diploma is, or should be, the least of what defines you. Show me someone whose identity is rooted in where he or she went to college. I’ll show you someone you really, really don’t want at your Super Bowl party.

And your diploma will have infinitely less relevance to your fulfillment than so much else: the wisdom with which you choose your romantic partners; your interactions with the community you inhabit; your generosity toward the family that you inherited or the family that you’ve made.

It’s time that parents start making this “college game” less of a competition and more of journey to find a college where their kid will flourish.