Tag Archives: parenting college-bound teens

how to, parenting

How to provide parental support

 

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parental supportSocial support of any kind is crucial when you are going through a new and challenging (and exciting!) experience. The college experience is one of the most stressful, especially in the first year when students are still figuring out how to navigate the world on their own. Parents can play a huge role in their child’s success in college, and throughout their education. Parental support and wisdom helps in countless ways. Not only does your support help motivate and get them through this new experience, it also helps the both of you grow.

Motivation and Focus

Being there for your college student shows him or her that you care about what they are doing. It demonstrates that someone, one of the most important people in their lives no less, believes in them. That does wonders for motivation, particularly when the task at hand it a difficult one. It helps cement the idea that all their efforts are worthwhile.

Adjusting to the “Real World”

Your kids may have reluctantly listened, or avoided listening, to your stories and advice while in high school. Now that they are out of the house and dealing with things on their own, they are much more likely to appreciate hearing your take on a matter. They can learn so much from your life experiences and typically know they don’t have to be embarrassed or ashamed to ask for your help.

Easing the “real world” stress, whether it is financial or emotional, will help them get through this challenging time and ultimately find success in school. They are faced with several new responsibilities all at once – paying bills, managing their time, making all their meals, and so on. Of course you shouldn’t do anything for them, but pointing them in the right direction or sending a care package will go a long way.

You Both Grow

Your roles are changing. This experience gives you a chance to grow into friends. It is an opportunity to see each other in a different light. You are learning to trust and ease control. You are taking on a supportive role and letting them take charge of their own life. Your college student is developing their own identity separate from you. They are learning how to effectively handle responsibilities and how to solve their problems on their own.

Being there will show them that their life won’t fall apart when things get tough. They can still rely on you. But there is a limit. Don’t let them take advantage of you – that won’t help anyone. And never coddle. As much as you may want to protect them from the harshness of the world, let them take the lead.

___________________

Author Bio:

Haley Coffman is a recent college grad at the age of 31. The road to her degree was a long and windy one, but she made it! She now enjoys working with eDegree, helping students (and their parents) navigate through their own college career.

college guidance, college planning, parenting

5 Things to teach your kids before they leave for college

images-1While educators are largely responsible for seeing to the academic needs of your children (although you will likely have to help a bit), your role as a parent is to prepare your children in other ways so that they can learn to care for themselves, live independently, make good decisions, and become functioning members of society when they leave home and strike out on their own. You’ll teach them all kinds of life skills during their time in your care, such as how to groom and dress themselves, the rules of appropriate social behavior, and the value of hard work. But there are certain lessons you’ll want to impart to your kids before they depart for the vaunted halls of learning. Here are five things to teach your kids before they leave for college:

  1. Proper nutrition. You’ve no doubt been cooking for your kids their whole lives, which means they could leave home with little idea of how to feed themselves. Unless you teach them, they won’t know how to plan a healthy diet, shop for groceries, or prepare nutritious and balanced meals. But these are skills that you can teach your teens throughout their time in high school simply by making them help you with every aspect. Although they will have limited resources on campus with dorm rooms short on kitchen amenities, a thorough knowledge of diet and nutrition will at least help them to make healthy choices in the cafeteria.
  2. Organization. There are a couple of reasons why organization is an important skill for college students to master. First of all, they’re going to live in dorm rooms that are roughly the size of a shoe box, and most likely they’ll be sharing them with other students. The ability to organize one’s space will make this situation far more livable. But knowing how to organize one’s time is even more important to the harried student who has to juggle classes, studying, activities, internships, and perhaps even a part-time job. If you don’t help your kids develop these organizational skills they may sink when you throw them into the turbulent waters of campus life.
  3. Cleanliness. Sure your kids know how to pick up their clothes and put them in the hamper, but can they wash them? Chores like dusting, vacuuming, and doing the laundry may seem pretty basic, but that’s only because you’ve been doing them so long that they’ve become second nature. Your best bet to prepare your kids to see to their own cleanliness is to start assigning them chores when they’re young so that they form lifelong habits that will travel with them to college and beyond.
  4. Financial concerns. It’s surprising how many parents fail to impart even rote information about personal finances. Perhaps they assume that it’s covered in school. Unfortunately, this leaves many students facing a pile of debt or even damaged credit by the time they graduate. So talk to your kids about the dangers of credit cards and teach them basics like budgeting, balancing a checkbook, and preparing for taxes.
  5. How to reach goals. By showing your kids how to achieve successes through visualizing their goals, creating a step-by-step plan of action, using affirmations, building confidence, and adjusting course as necessary, you can help them to reach their potential. Whether your kids are eventually bound for Harvard Law or MBA online programs, they’re going to have to take certain steps if they want to reach their professional goals.

Parenting is much more about teaching lessons and setting examples than just funding their educations. Take the time to prepare them for college.