Tag Archives: parenting

Supporting Your Teen’s Career Aspirations

career

Research shows that parents have a strong influence over their child’s college or career path. That influence may be subtle, and beyond the conscious awareness of the child, or often not so subtle. Parents have been known to push a child into a career path for numerous reasons, most have nothing to do with the child’s interests.

Parents are the number one influence in the career and college major choices made by their children.  

Growing up, my parents had some friends who insisted their children and even their son-in-laws follow the father’s career path as a doctor. They all attended college and medical school following in his footsteps. They all became doctors, but not all were happy in their careers. Most were miserable and floundered around until finally giving up and leaving the medical profession. Not only did they waste years on their education and a medical degree, but they have never recovered from what they perceived to be a failure.

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Helping Your Teen find their future career

career

You might think teenagers have it easy, after all, they have no real responsibilities – what could they possibly worry about?! However, teenagers actually feel a lot of pressure. They are expected to figure out what they want to do for the next X amount of years in their education, as well as have a good idea of what they would like to do in their professional lives once education is over. It’s a lot to think about for a brain that isn’t fully developed yet (and for a person that likely doesn’t 100% know themselves, and is not free from the pressures/expectations of friends/family) to handle. 

It can be really difficult for them to figure out what it is they want to do, but as their parent, you can help them. Remember that no matter if they want to become a Massage Therapist, chef or a writer, it is your job to support and guide them wherever you can. Below, we’ll go through some of the things you can do to help them figure it all out.

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Using the Summer for College Prep

summer

Before you think I’m advocating “heads to the grindstone” this summer, rest assured these activities will not consume your or your student’s summer months. What this summer college prep will do is prepare your student for the upcoming school year and help him enter the next phase of his education thinking and planning for college.

The summer before middle school

Entering middle school is a huge transition for students. They go from one classroom to multiple classrooms, lockers, multiple teachers, and more homework. The summer before your student begins middle school is the perfect time to begin preparation for the future. Although it might seem premature to start thinking about college, it’s never too early. Your child needs a strong middle school foundation in order to take the high school courses that colleges expect of a college-bound student. 

For a list of 10 tips for soon-to-be middle school parents, click here.

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Creating the Perfect Study Environment

study

Most parents aren’t going to be all that hands-on with the kind of living environment that their kid makes for themselves while they’re out at college. However, if they’re looking to study more effectively, then it’s important to realize just how crucial their surroundings are for that. Here are a few tips to help them create an environment much better suited to their aims.

A comfortable place to study is key

First of all, you need to make sure those physical needs are taken care of. If studying involves poring over the books or working at the PC on a desk, then you have to make sure that can be done comfortably. Look at some of the ergonomic chairs at Chair Office that you could potentially invest in. Make sure there’s plenty of lighting to contrast any screen lights to prevent eyestrain, too.

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Does Your Student Need Tutoring Outside the Classroom?

tutoring

As parents, we all want the best for our children’s education. That’s why we often spend a fair amount of time selecting the right school based on everything from school table ratings to student testimonials. Yet, after these initial attempts to get schooling right, it’s surprising how many parents sit back and assume that their children will go on to flourish. 

Unfortunately, as many parents go on to realise, not all children are created equal – a school situation that’s ideal for one could well hold another very much at the back of the class. In this respect, it doesn’t matter how highly rated or competitive your school of choice; the chances are that outside help from an English tutor or similar would still benefit your child. Far from being a sign that you made the wrong schooling choice, this is simply a testament to the different ways in which children learn and can fast help your child get back on track if you act quickly. 

Here, we’re going to help you do just that by considering a few of the most obvious signs that your child could benefit from outside assistance like this. 

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Parenting During College Prep

college prep

I’ll admit (willingly) that I like to offer my unsolicited advice to my children. Even though they are grown, I feel the need to continue to parent. As they did when they were younger, they smile, listen, and then do things their own way. It’s a type of dance parents and kids do with one another.

The hardest part of parenting during college prep is finding a balance in your parenting. You want to encourage them, guide them and help them make the right choices. But when you push too hard, nag and set guidelines that interfere with their independence and individual choices you create a stressful and frustrating college preparation experience. This is a monumental step in your child’s life and you don’t want to taint it with fighting, frustration and family discourse.

Common sense isn’t a flower that grows in everyone’s garden.

Following are 5 tips for parents of college-bound teens (based around good old southern truisms) to keep peace in the home and reduce the stress related to the college admissions process:

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Are You Having Graduation Anxiety?

graduation

High school graduation day is supposed to be one of the best days in your life. But the unsettling truth is it can be a time of great anxiety—for both students and parents. Even though this is a milestone, a combination of both positive and negative emotions can turn this happy time into one filled with stress. It’s hard to imagine that this time for celebration also produces feelings of fear, frustration, sadness and separation. But it does.

Why is there such anxiety around this time of celebration and accomplishment?

Graduation Anxiety for the Students

Of course students are happy and excited about their graduation; but they can also exhibit signs of stress and anxiety. The very nature of this life event brings a whole range of emotions to the surface. It’s important for parents to understand what their teen is feeling to help them through the transition.

Fearing the unknown

It’s only natural for students to be afraid of what lies ahead. Even if they have visited the campus and talked to faculty and students, the very fact that they will be entering uncharted territory brings up the fear. They have no idea what to expect once they arrive on campus. They know academics will be more difficult—will they be able to handle the rigors of college courses? All of these unknown factors cause them to be afraid (even though they might not admit it).

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Searching for The Most Generous Colleges

This article was originally written for University Parent as a part of their parent program.

generous colleges

Everyone likes a good bargain.

We rush out on Black Friday to get the best deals for Christmas — we stand in line in the freezing cold to save money! But do parents put as much effort and attention into finding a college bargain? Student debt statistics would say they don’t. Would you want your student graduating from college saddled with that debt? I imagine not!

College bargains do exist and if you have a student who intends to start college in the fall, it’s your job as a parent to point him in their direction. College is a huge consumer purchase which you can and should approach much as you would the purchase of a home or car. Do your research, compare the prices, and help your student choose a school that gives you the best bang for your buck.

One of my favorite movies is Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House. In it, Mr. Blandings tells his lawyer that “some purchases you make with your heart and not your head.” As I said, I love the movie, but this is bad advice. When it comes to your college “purchase,” use your head first and then listen to your heart.

I understand that it can be challenging to get students to look at the college choice from this point of view. When my daughter was applying, all her choices were east coast private schools with huge price tags. As a parent, I wanted her to have her dream but, also as her parent, I wanted her to graduate without being burdened with debt. Her heart told her to go to the college that offered the least amount of merit aid. Her head, after a long “money talk” and re-evaluation of her second choice, led her to a school that allowed her to graduate with a small amount of student loan debt. She’s grateful every day that I guided her in that direction.

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Helping Your Student Study Effectively

study

We can forget how much of an impact we have on our children. When it comes to getting ready for college, we may think that our job is very simple: to ensure that our children study. But if we provide the wrong environment or we don’t enforce it the right way, this will have a more devastating impact on their academics than we realized. To make sure our children are studying effectively, we’ve got to make sure the environment is effective so their frame of mind is ready for study. How can you make the environment and the mindset work together?

Minimizing External Stresses

We all have an inherent need to procrastinate on occasion. If you have spent a long time trying to get your children to study and were met with resistance every step of the way, it’s hardly a surprise that when they need to knuckle down and study, they will look for any reason to avoid it. Even something that is not their responsibility can be the perfect excuse. It’s about making sure that they have a conducive study area, but this means that you need to realize the impact of a perfect study area.

By creating an environment that is not too hot, not too cold, not too bright, and not too noisy is crucial. This means making sure everything is working as it should. For example, something as noisy as the air conditioning can be a distraction and if it’s not working properly, the environment will be completely uncomfortable, and there are plenty of 24 hour AC service providers that can help people. It’s about getting all those little things correct. 

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A Look Into the College Admissions Scandal

college admissions

Netflix recently released a documentary/re-enactment of the Varsity Blues scandal over college admissions. You probably heard the news last year about rich parents paying bribes to get their less than stellar students into elite universities. If you have the time, have a student heading to college, or are simply interested to see how the scandal unfolded watch the documentary.

As I watched I realized how much the media highlighted the celebrities involved and neglected to examine why this happened. The college admissions system is broken. Granted, there has always been those who benefit from huge donors, legacies and connections. But the overwhelming desire to get into the “prestigious” colleges has caused parents and students to step outside the normal boundaries and into illegal and damaging practices.

I won’t go into details about the sting, or the characters involved, but I think it’s important to focus on some take-aways from the documentary and also think about what we learned from all of it.

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