I’ll admit (willingly) that I like to offer my unsolicited advice to my children, often in the form of southern truisms (I grew up in the south and was raised by a family of southerners). Even though they are grown, I feel the need to continue to parent. As they did when they were younger, they smile, listen, and then do things their own way. It’s a type of dance parents and kids do with one another.

The hardest part of the college admissions process for a parent is finding a balance in your parenting. You want to encourage them, guide them and help them make the right choices. But when you push too hard, nag and set guidelines that interfere with their independence and individual choices you create a stressful and frustrating college preparation experience. This is a monumental step in your child’s life and you don’t want to taint it with fighting, frustration and family discourse.

Following are 5 tips for parents of college-bound teens (based around good old southern truisms) to keep peace in the home and reduce the stress related to the college admissions process: