If you have a high school student thinking about college, be prepared to hear these words after their first few weeks, “I don’t like it here. I want to change colleges”. As your heart sinks and a hundred things go through your head, remember that I told you it would happen; and if you read this article it might help you handle those words without your heart and brain exploding into a million pieces.
Continue reading How to Respond if Your Student Wants to Change Colleges
Parents often have to make tough decisions where their kids are concerned. And while you want the best for your child, and that desire influences your every choice, even you have to admit that you don’t always choose correctly – parents are just people trying to do the best they can! At some point you’re going to have to let your teen take the reins and make his own decisions, even if you think he’s making a huge mistake. But as a parent it’s still your job to help him in any way you can. While you might not exert the same influence over a teenager as you did over a toddler, your opinion still matters. So when it comes to ensuring that your child end up at the right institution of higher learning, the one that will help him to maximize his potential and prepare for a successful and fulfilling career, the onus is on you, to some degree, to make sure he has all the facts needed to make an informed decision about his future.
Even with all your input and exhaustive research, he could end up at the wrong college with the wrong major. Here are just a few things to consider when determining whether your kid is at the right college or if he’s in need of transfer to a more suitable school.
There are plenty of reasons why a college might not end up being the best choice for any given student, but when it comes to your child you want to be sure. After all, this can be a fairly costly mistake, what with the complications inherent in transferring to a new school. As a parent, your job in this situation is to determine whether your college student is truly miserable and misplaced at his current campus or if he is simply making a mountain out of a molehill when it comes to complaints about his current situation.
You and your student will no doubt put a lot of time, effort, and deliberation into selecting the appropriate college. But things don’t always turn out like you hope. Even with the help of a comprehensive ranking system, information from school advisors, and visits to college campuses, your student may eventually discover that the school he has settled on isn’t what he wants, for one reason or another. Perhaps he’s looking for practical studies and it turns out that the program for his major is largely theoretical, analytical, or historical in nature, just for example. He may decide partway through that he wants to change his major to something that his school of choice doesn’t specialize in or that it isn’t highly ranked in, at any rate (this is more common than you might imagine). So if it turns out that your student went for a major in contract law when what he really wanted was an urban planning career degree, discuss this change with him and determine the financial consequences of his change of interest and/or passion.
It could be that your student has selected a campus that is far away and the homesickness is too much for him to handle on top of all the other stresses of entering college. If your college student asks to transfer, tread lightly. It could be more than the wrong educational choice. It could be homesickness, not fitting in, or even the feeling that they are overwhelmed. Make sure it’s not a temporary response to stress. Encourage them to finish out the semester and then make a well-informed decision.
If he discovers that the courses offered aren’t going to help him to get the knowledge and skills needed for his career of choice, then perhaps you should consider supporting his move to another school that can meet his needs. A happy student is a successful student.